Why shouldn’t Michael Bloomberg be mayor of London?

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/apr/06/micheal-bloomberg-mayor-london-new-york

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The rumour that the former mayor of New York Michael Bloomberg is thinking of running as mayor of London confirms what the rest of Britain has long known. The United Kingdom is continuing to dissolve. New York and London are really one city, separated only by an airport runway. But both are thousands of miles distant from their hinterlands. That is why Boris Johnson could run for mayor of New York tomorrow. But he stands no more chance north of Watford than Bloomberg would in Kansas City.

New York/London was once thought, wrongly, to have given its name to nylon, perhaps because to outsiders both were slippery, synthetic and overheated. The two cities have long thought alike. They share an obsession with monetary greed, showbusiness, restaurants and house prices. There is no reason why they should not share a mayor.

Bloomberg curbed New York’s police and crime (up to a point). He seized control of the schools. He faced down the tobacco and sugar lobbies. Above all he “won”, as he puts it, the 2012 Olympics. He did so by losing New York’s bid and allocating the money to renovating Manhattan’s west side, housing and a High Line extension, now completed. Meanwhile, London blew £9bn on a vanity project and turned Stratford into what, three years on, is still a bleak wilderness.

Besides, London is now more cosmopolitan than New York – judged by number of citizens born abroad. It already has plenty of ethnic minority politicians. Why not an American mayor, when the due citizenship formalities are arranged? After Bloomberg, the French should get a turn. There are 400,000 French people in London, or twice the number of Americans. That is probably a higher percentage than at any time since the Norman conquest.

Ed, beware the Scots

Talking of the Normans, while London falls under the sway of New York, it should come as no surprise that Scotland’s Nicola Sturgeon is discussing with the French ambassador who should be the next prime minister in London. She is merely following in the footsteps of the last Queen of Scots, Mary. The Scottish Catholics colluded with the French against Elizabeth I. Bonnie Prince Charlie and his Jacobites colluded with the French, and indeed with the Tories in London, against the Hanoverians. Scotland was always “the postern gate” for intruders into England. But then it was also the Scots who ratted on Charles I in the civil war and backed Cromwell.

If I were Ed Miliband seeking a “confidence and supply” deal with the SNP at Westminster, I would eat my haggis with a very long spoon.

Fair weather Wales

As for yet more extremity politics, Leanne Wood of Plaid Cymru may have drowned in cliches in the television debate, but she won headlines in the Welsh press for her putdown of Nigel Farage. But in her championing of Wales she forgot to mention the weather – not the actual weather, but the weather forecast. Time and again it depicts her country, inaccurately, as wet and drenched in gloom.

Last week was no exception. The forecast for the Welsh coast over the Easter break would have tested the cheer of a Bardsey saint. Apart from a patch of blue sky last Saturday afternoon, it promised nothing but rain, cloud, cold and gloom. As it turned out, the weekend was as glorious an Easter as I can remember, with sun blazing down on hillside and sea alike. The online BBC weather forecast changed its tune only when it noticed the sun was actually shining.

Loos talk with Burundi

The best loos these days are in cathedrals. Inside a booth in Worcester Cathedral’s cloister lavatory last week a sign solemnly declared: “This toilet is twinned with latrine No 2176 in Burundi.” Twinning normally involves civic dignitaries on freebie exchanges, much photographed in the local press. Were we to envisage Worcester’s dean and chapter in full clerical garb sitting on a row of Burundian latrines, and with a return visit from African divines? I looked at my watch. It was surely 1 April. Except it was not.