That's punny: the winning puns at comedy championships

http://www.theguardian.com/stage/2015/feb/13/winning-puns-comedy-championships-leicester-leo-kearse

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Comedian Leo Kearse has emerged triumphant after facing off seven other punslingers at the UK Pun Championships, held on Thursday as part of Dave’s Leicester Comedy festival.

Kearse saw off competition from Rob Thomas, Tony Cowards, Richard Woolford, Martin Croser, Richard Pulsford, Rob Coleman and last year’s winner, Darren Walsh.

The contest is a sort of comedy rap battle with the comedians punning on different topics over four rounds. The audience eliminate acts from each round. Kearse beat Thomas in the final round.

Kearse’s puns include:

I was in hospital last week. I asked the nurse if I could do my own stitches. She said “suture self”

Growing up on a farm, my dad was always telling me to use the indoor toilet. But I preferred to go against the grain

In Iran, everyone’s scared of spiders. But in Iraq no phobia.

Marvin Gaye kept a sheep in my vineyard. He’d herd it through the grapevine

Runner-up Thomas’s puns include:

My kids can’t access videos of twerking on our home PC: we’ve got Norton Anti-Cyrus

The second edition of the annual competition was hosted by Lee Nelson. Dave’s Leicester Comedy festival continues until 22 February.

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