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Benedict Cumberbatch needs to be more careful with words. But we can all learn from his apology Benedict Cumberbatch needs to be more careful with words. But we can all learn from his apology
(2 months later)
Benedict Cumberbatch made quite the blunderdict cumbergaffe (NOT SORRY) over the weekend during an appearance on American author and activist Tavis Smiley’s eponymous TV talkshow, clumsily referring to people of colour as “coloured”. Cumberbatch was criticising the dearth of roles for people of colour in showbusiness – particularly in the UK – when he said: “I think as far as coloured actors go, it gets really different in the UK, and a lot of my friends have had more opportunities here [in America] than in the UK, and that’s something that needs to change.”Benedict Cumberbatch made quite the blunderdict cumbergaffe (NOT SORRY) over the weekend during an appearance on American author and activist Tavis Smiley’s eponymous TV talkshow, clumsily referring to people of colour as “coloured”. Cumberbatch was criticising the dearth of roles for people of colour in showbusiness – particularly in the UK – when he said: “I think as far as coloured actors go, it gets really different in the UK, and a lot of my friends have had more opportunities here [in America] than in the UK, and that’s something that needs to change.”
The term “coloured people”, while not precisely a racial slur, is antiquated (conjuring images of separate water fountains and segregated schools), and could be read as dehumanising – as though white people are the norm and everyone else has been altered, scribbled on, had colour applied to their true selves. The preferred terminology at the moment – and, perhaps, what Cumberbatch was grasping for – is “people of colour”, a linguistic choice that may very well evolve and become obsolete too, in its time. That’s what language does. Isn’t language exciting?The term “coloured people”, while not precisely a racial slur, is antiquated (conjuring images of separate water fountains and segregated schools), and could be read as dehumanising – as though white people are the norm and everyone else has been altered, scribbled on, had colour applied to their true selves. The preferred terminology at the moment – and, perhaps, what Cumberbatch was grasping for – is “people of colour”, a linguistic choice that may very well evolve and become obsolete too, in its time. That’s what language does. Isn’t language exciting?
Few things inspire the level of indignant condescension you get when you suggest that people be careful with their words. “Why,” someone inevitably snorts, “is it OK to say ‘people of colour’, but grievously offensive to utter the only slightly rearranged ‘coloured people’? Why don’t I get to say whatever I want? Also, who moved my binky!?!??” While I’m sure we could spend days or weeks exploring the rich, fraught etymology of “coloured”, the power of reclaiming oppressive terms, and the finer points of how language influences culture, the real answer is DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT, BRO. Not your business. Not your problem.Few things inspire the level of indignant condescension you get when you suggest that people be careful with their words. “Why,” someone inevitably snorts, “is it OK to say ‘people of colour’, but grievously offensive to utter the only slightly rearranged ‘coloured people’? Why don’t I get to say whatever I want? Also, who moved my binky!?!??” While I’m sure we could spend days or weeks exploring the rich, fraught etymology of “coloured”, the power of reclaiming oppressive terms, and the finer points of how language influences culture, the real answer is DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT, BRO. Not your business. Not your problem.
If people tell you that a word harms them, just don’t use that word. It’s easy. There are so many words in the world! And if you legitimately think that having to take a millisecond to swap one word out for another word is somehow more offensive than being reminded of the pervasive, deadly dehumanisation of your entire community, then have you considered hermitdom? In your desolate mountain cave, no one can hear you say racial slurs.If people tell you that a word harms them, just don’t use that word. It’s easy. There are so many words in the world! And if you legitimately think that having to take a millisecond to swap one word out for another word is somehow more offensive than being reminded of the pervasive, deadly dehumanisation of your entire community, then have you considered hermitdom? In your desolate mountain cave, no one can hear you say racial slurs.
If you do choose to remain a member of society, here is my foolproof two-step process to not using a word (this goes for gender pronouns, too, by the way): 1. When a situation arises in which you’d usually use that word, don’t. 2. Use the word you’ve been asked to use instead.If you do choose to remain a member of society, here is my foolproof two-step process to not using a word (this goes for gender pronouns, too, by the way): 1. When a situation arises in which you’d usually use that word, don’t. 2. Use the word you’ve been asked to use instead.
Cumberbatch, to his credit, appears to be on board already. His apology is a model of unequivocal contrition: “I’m devastated to have caused offence by using this outmoded terminology. I offer my sincere apologies. I make no excuse for my being an idiot and know the damage is done.”Cumberbatch, to his credit, appears to be on board already. His apology is a model of unequivocal contrition: “I’m devastated to have caused offence by using this outmoded terminology. I offer my sincere apologies. I make no excuse for my being an idiot and know the damage is done.”
Now, that apology isn’t directed at me, and it’s not my place to accept or reject it. But I do think that those of us who make mistakes – sometimes egregious ones – can learn from it. Now, that apology isn’t directed at me, and it’s not my place to accept or reject it. But I do think that those of us who make mistakes – sometimes egregious ones – can learn from them.
Best case scenario would be to not say racially offensive stuff in the first place, especially if you are from a very rich family whose wealth and success derives directly from slavery. Also, if you are a highly educated person who has lived in the 21st century as long as any of us, there is not a ton of room for error here. Cumberbatch was already in the hole there, thrice over. Best case scenario would be to not say racially offensive stuff in the first place, especially if you are from a very rich family whose wealth and success derive directly from slavery. Also, if you are a highly educated person who has lived in the 21st century as long as any of us, there is not a ton of room for error here. Cumberbatch was already in the hole there, thrice over.
Second-best scenario would be to have a time machine. If Cumberbatch does have a time machine, and he simply chose not to use it, then his apology just got a lot less impressive. I know it’s a little extra legwork, but you need to go back in time, slap on a fake moustache, sneak into the studio audience at Tavis Smiley, and throw pebbles at your past self’s face until he remembers not to be a goober. (I’m really, really disappointed in you, timetravelling Benedict Cumberbatch.) Second-best scenario would be to have a time machine. If Cumberbatch does have a time machine, and he simply chose not to use it, then his apology just got a lot less impressive. I know it’s a little extra legwork, but you need to go back in time, slap on a fake moustache, sneak into the studio audience at Tavis Smiley, and throw pebbles at your past self’s face until he remembers not to be a goober. (I’m really, really disappointed in you, time-travelling Benedict Cumberbatch.)
Third-best scenario, if you find offensive words coming out of your mouth and you don’t have a time machine, and you realise with a sinking feeling that you cannot suck sounds back into your lungs, would be to issue an effusive apology and then donate a billion dollars to progressive charities that help to dismantle the systemic oppression of underserved communities. Then donate another billion to time-machine research and hop back up to scenario two.Third-best scenario, if you find offensive words coming out of your mouth and you don’t have a time machine, and you realise with a sinking feeling that you cannot suck sounds back into your lungs, would be to issue an effusive apology and then donate a billion dollars to progressive charities that help to dismantle the systemic oppression of underserved communities. Then donate another billion to time-machine research and hop back up to scenario two.
And fourth best, if none of the above seems feasible, just issue a heartfelt apology like a grownup. Cumberbatch’s is good. He doesn’t put conditions on his apology, he doesn’t fish for sympathy, he doesn’t try to explain anything away, he’s not sorry “that you’re offended”. He just screwed up (in a way that, he acknowledges, does damage beyond just hurt feelings), and he’s sorry.And fourth best, if none of the above seems feasible, just issue a heartfelt apology like a grownup. Cumberbatch’s is good. He doesn’t put conditions on his apology, he doesn’t fish for sympathy, he doesn’t try to explain anything away, he’s not sorry “that you’re offended”. He just screwed up (in a way that, he acknowledges, does damage beyond just hurt feelings), and he’s sorry.
Most importantly, if you’ve done all that, and people are still mad at you, just shut up. Be quiet. Listen for a while. Sometimes people don’t forgive you, and that’s OK. You’re not entitled to redemption, and a good apology doesn’t demand it.Most importantly, if you’ve done all that, and people are still mad at you, just shut up. Be quiet. Listen for a while. Sometimes people don’t forgive you, and that’s OK. You’re not entitled to redemption, and a good apology doesn’t demand it.