This article is from the source 'guardian' and was first published or seen on . It last changed over 40 days ago and won't be checked again for changes.

You can find the current article at its original source at http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/dec/12/strangest-place-uk-sutton-normal-newcastle-east-grinstead

The article has changed 3 times. There is an RSS feed of changes available.

Version 0 Version 1
Are these the five strangest places in the UK? Are these the five strangest places in the UK?
(about 2 hours later)
Residents of the south London suburb of Sutton were probably surprised to find their quiet borough hitting the national news headlines this week, until they discovered that it was only because it has been described as “the most normal place in Britain”. The remark was made to a committee of MPs by Neil Couling, the services director at the Department for Work and Pensions, and an expert on mediocrity thanks to his role in implementing the universal credit scheme.Residents of the south London suburb of Sutton were probably surprised to find their quiet borough hitting the national news headlines this week, until they discovered that it was only because it has been described as “the most normal place in Britain”. The remark was made to a committee of MPs by Neil Couling, the services director at the Department for Work and Pensions, and an expert on mediocrity thanks to his role in implementing the universal credit scheme.
Couling explained to MPs that Sutton was the ideal place to trail a new benefits service because it had such an average population. “It’s the most normal place in Britain,” he said. “Its population is average for the United Kingdom as a whole.” He added: “It’s a wonderful place and I adore it,” before seemingly admitting that he had never actually been there.Couling explained to MPs that Sutton was the ideal place to trail a new benefits service because it had such an average population. “It’s the most normal place in Britain,” he said. “Its population is average for the United Kingdom as a whole.” He added: “It’s a wonderful place and I adore it,” before seemingly admitting that he had never actually been there.
On that evidential basis, I too am happy to declare my love for Sutton, and also to declare that it’s too boring to discuss any further. Not least because thinking about what makes the residents of Sutton so “normal” immediately gets me wondering about what an abnormal set of UK people might look like? Where can the DWP go to make an even bigger hash of their trial scheme than the one they’ll undoubtedly make in Sutton?On that evidential basis, I too am happy to declare my love for Sutton, and also to declare that it’s too boring to discuss any further. Not least because thinking about what makes the residents of Sutton so “normal” immediately gets me wondering about what an abnormal set of UK people might look like? Where can the DWP go to make an even bigger hash of their trial scheme than the one they’ll undoubtedly make in Sutton?
I have a few suggestions: These are my suggestions:
Cambridge … Particularly during term time, Cambridge has a distinctly non-average population. This isn’t so much to do with the fact that they are academic high achievers, or that over the years the place has generated more Nobel prize winners than France, as the fact that these are people who call kitchens “gyp rooms”, have their stuff tidied by “bedders” and most of whom don medieval gowns every other week in order to have their food served to them in candlelit halls. This place is Hogwarts for wankers. Cambridge
Glastonbury … Reputed to have been the home to King Arthur, our Lord Jesus Christ and numerous Hedgewitches, Glastonbury is now the place to go if you want to be seduced by an aging hippy in a rainbow-coloured jumper. Here the local industry apparently consists of flogging crystals, catching dreams and explaining to people that they have been horribly treated in a past life. No doubt that any data gathered here would skew the DWP survey massively – although possibly the strangest thing about Glastonbury is the way it warps reality. After a few hours in town, all the people smelling of patchouli and weed start to look the same and seem oddly conformist. It’s a place where being out there is entirely normal. Particularly during term time, Cambridge has a distinctly non-average population. This isn’t so much to do with the fact that they are academic high achievers, or that over the years the place has generated more Nobel prize winners than France, as the fact that these are people who call kitchens “gyp rooms”, have their stuff tidied by “bedders” and most of whom don medieval gowns every other week in order to have their food served to them in candlelit halls. This place is Hogwarts for wankers.
East Grinstead … In recent years, the quiet market town of East Grinstead has been home to major headquarters buildings for several religious groups including Rosicrucians, Scientologists, Christian Scientists, the Ashworth Dowsers, the Pagan Federation, Opus Dei and the Church of The Latter Day Saints, not to mention a large number of Christian denominations. This means that an unusually high proportion of the 24,000 people living there are likely to dislike doctors, or wear hairshirts, or pretend they are eating the flesh of their saviour every Sunday. They might even believe that we are inhabited by the disembodied souls of people blown up in a huge volcano thousands of years ago, or worship a book stating that elephants used to roam around in America, along with Jesus Christ. Glastonbury
Newcastle … Not long ago, I met a tour operator who was visiting his sister in a Thai pub in Norwich. He’d had a couple of drinks and was boasting about his job – as well he might, since it consisted of travelling to the world’s finest cities and partying. He came from Bangkok, which he told me is no slouch when it comes to carousing – but he was absolutely certain that the craziest place he had been in more than 20 years of constant travel was Newcastle-upon-Tyne. He even had started taking groups of Thai tourists there just to marvel at the people pouring onto the quayside, legs and arms exposed to the biting winds of winter, no one wearing coats, everyone drinking more in a night than normal mortals would get through in a month. “These people,” he explained, “they are not like you and me.” Reputed to have been the home to King Arthur, our Lord Jesus Christ and numerous Hedgewitches, Glastonbury is now the place to go if you want to be seduced by an aging hippy in a rainbow-coloured jumper. Here the local industry apparently consists of flogging crystals, catching dreams and explaining to people that they have been horribly treated in a past life. No doubt that any data gathered here would skew the DWP survey massively – although possibly the strangest thing about Glastonbury is the way it warps reality. After a few hours in town, all the people smelling of patchouli and weed start to look the same and seem oddly conformist. It’s a place where being out there is entirely normal.
The City of London … There are plenty of outward signs of the City of London’s abnormality: the bulging phallic towers, the men in pink shirts downing bottles of £5,000 champagne after work, the bins displaying electronic stockmarket indicators. But it’s the hidden stuff that makes this place truly strange. The fact that the City of London Corporation, which runs the Square Mile, has its own police force and better still its own militia. The fact that it has someone called the Remembrancer who gets to sit unelected in the House of Commons, right behind the Speaker’s chair and check through all legislation that the house passes. The fact that the elected representatives in the Corporation rely on a medieval system of voting that gives most of the votes away to non-residents, who don’t actually get to vote because the votes are allotted to banks and corporations within the Square Mile, whose company bosses then decide who will be elected. The truth is that this might as well be an entirely separate state to the UK – and that thanks to its financial clout and remorseless lobbying, the usual rules just don’t apply here. East Grinstead
In recent years, the quiet market town of East Grinstead has been home to major headquarters buildings for several religious groups including Rosicrucians, Scientologists, Christian Scientists, the Ashworth Dowsers, the Pagan Federation, Opus Dei and the Church of The Latter Day Saints, not to mention a large number of Christian denominations. This means that an unusually high proportion of the 24,000 people living there are likely to dislike doctors, or wear hairshirts, or pretend they are eating the flesh of their saviour every Sunday. They might even believe that we are inhabited by the disembodied souls of people blown up in a huge volcano thousands of years ago, or worship a book stating that elephants used to roam around in America, along with Jesus Christ.
Newcastle
Not long ago, I met a tour operator who was visiting his sister in a Thai pub in Norwich. He’d had a couple of drinks and was boasting about his job – as well he might, since it consisted of travelling to the world’s finest cities and partying. He came from Bangkok, which he told me is no slouch when it comes to carousing – but he was absolutely certain that the craziest place he had been in more than 20 years of constant travel was Newcastle-upon-Tyne. He even had started taking groups of Thai tourists there just to marvel at the people pouring onto the quayside, legs and arms exposed to the biting winds of winter, no one wearing coats, everyone drinking more in a night than normal mortals would get through in a month. “These people,” he explained, “they are not like you and me.”
The City of London
There are plenty of outward signs of the City of London’s abnormality: the bulging phallic towers, the men in pink shirts downing bottles of £5,000 champagne after work, the bins displaying electronic stockmarket indicators. But it’s the hidden stuff that makes this place truly strange. The fact that the City of London Corporation, which runs the Square Mile, has its own police force and better still its own militia. The fact that it has someone called the Remembrancer who gets to sit unelected in the House of Commons, right behind the Speaker’s chair and check through all legislation that the house passes. The fact that the elected representatives in the Corporation rely on a medieval system of voting that gives most of the votes away to non-residents, who don’t actually get to vote because the votes are allotted to banks and corporations within the Square Mile, whose company bosses then decide who will be elected. The truth is that this might as well be an entirely separate state to the UK – and that thanks to its financial clout and remorseless lobbying, the usual rules just don’t apply here.
• Tell us the most eccentric place you’ve ever been in the thread below• Tell us the most eccentric place you’ve ever been in the thread below