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Wish you were here Mr Cameron, not on the beach again Wish you were here Mr Cameron, not on the beach again
(7 months later)
Irrespective of his other qualities and any possible extension to his tenure, there can now be little doubt that David Cameron will be remembered as one of history's most fearless vacationers. Until recently, his achievements in ostentatious holidaying, although substantial, were still surpassed by those of the great vacationer, George Bush, whose presidency featured 77 trips to Texas, of Barack Obama (more than 190 rounds of golf as president) and of Tony Blair, whose entire political career can now be understood as a brilliantly successful stratagem for accessing free sunshine breaks on an ever more ambitious scale. Irrespective of his other qualities and any possible extension to his tenure, there can now be little doubt that David Cameron will be remembered as one of history's most fearless vacationers. Until recently, his achievements in ostentatious holidaying, although substantial, were still surpassed by those of the great vacationer, George Bush, whose presidency featured 77 trips to Texas, of Barack Obama (more than 190 rounds of golf as president) and of Tony Blair, whose entire political career can now be understood as a brilliantly successful stratagem for accessing free sunshine breaks on an ever more ambitious scale.
After atrocities by Islamic State coincided with his date in a Portuguese fish market, it was argued that Mr Cameron's 15 breaks since his election were actually nothing special considering the British weather, ditto the attentions towards his young children one would expect from the creator of the new "family test". His eagerness to holiday in one of the smarter parts of abroad, the same summer that European colleagues were mostly advertising domestic frugality, could equally be interpreted as an expression of his country's economic confidence, as opposed to defiant self-indulgence from a leader whose principal task is to act less weird than Ed Miliband.After atrocities by Islamic State coincided with his date in a Portuguese fish market, it was argued that Mr Cameron's 15 breaks since his election were actually nothing special considering the British weather, ditto the attentions towards his young children one would expect from the creator of the new "family test". His eagerness to holiday in one of the smarter parts of abroad, the same summer that European colleagues were mostly advertising domestic frugality, could equally be interpreted as an expression of his country's economic confidence, as opposed to defiant self-indulgence from a leader whose principal task is to act less weird than Ed Miliband.
Thus, it was not holiday frequency nor exotic destinations, but the strength of the prime minister's determination not to be separated from a favourite beach, even amid international trauma, which made such a tremendous impression last week, when a luxuriantly tanned Cameron returned to London after James Foley's murder, recited a few words, and re-embarked, under 24 hours later, for Cornwall.Thus, it was not holiday frequency nor exotic destinations, but the strength of the prime minister's determination not to be separated from a favourite beach, even amid international trauma, which made such a tremendous impression last week, when a luxuriantly tanned Cameron returned to London after James Foley's murder, recited a few words, and re-embarked, under 24 hours later, for Cornwall.
As the implications of Islamic State's apparently British-led butchering sank in, Cameron was resuming his annual regime in Rock, a decision that even if it did not lead to fresh illustrations of alleged complacency, would, he must have known but not cared, become a pretext for further viewings of the blue shirt sequence of photographs, or of last year's struggle between a scorched-looking Cameron and a Mickey Mouse towel. As it was, he was photographed within hours – pictures show him rising, Aphrodite-like, from the waves, the BlackBerry presumably lashed somewhere snug within his wetsuit.As the implications of Islamic State's apparently British-led butchering sank in, Cameron was resuming his annual regime in Rock, a decision that even if it did not lead to fresh illustrations of alleged complacency, would, he must have known but not cared, become a pretext for further viewings of the blue shirt sequence of photographs, or of last year's struggle between a scorched-looking Cameron and a Mickey Mouse towel. As it was, he was photographed within hours – pictures show him rising, Aphrodite-like, from the waves, the BlackBerry presumably lashed somewhere snug within his wetsuit.
For much of the public, at least that part that can also afford multiple holidays, this undeflected resolve has been received as a comforting sign that home-grown psychopathy cannot threaten the historic creed of keep calm and carry on. Especially when, as he emphasises, the premier is never more than a few feet from his mobile. Indeed, to judge by the assurances of the foreign secretary, Philip Hammond, there is no reason, even allowing for the absence of phone signal, why parliament could not be relocated, permanently, to the family-friendly Rock/Polzeath area, whose ready supply of holiday cottages might also solve at a stroke the kind of financial problems that beset struggling MPs such as Mark Simmonds, the Tory too poor to find central London accommodation adequate for his children's occasional visits.For much of the public, at least that part that can also afford multiple holidays, this undeflected resolve has been received as a comforting sign that home-grown psychopathy cannot threaten the historic creed of keep calm and carry on. Especially when, as he emphasises, the premier is never more than a few feet from his mobile. Indeed, to judge by the assurances of the foreign secretary, Philip Hammond, there is no reason, even allowing for the absence of phone signal, why parliament could not be relocated, permanently, to the family-friendly Rock/Polzeath area, whose ready supply of holiday cottages might also solve at a stroke the kind of financial problems that beset struggling MPs such as Mark Simmonds, the Tory too poor to find central London accommodation adequate for his children's occasional visits.
Yet, however irrational, the expectation that Cameron should now abandon the beach, if only as a symbolic gesture, or for reasons having to do with taste, has proved impossible to eradicate, to the point that his refusal to trade a few days on a beach for a let-up in anti-vacation hostilities begins to look almost as self-harming, in image terms, as the behaviour of those tanning addicts whose compulsion has become the subject of scientific investigation.Yet, however irrational, the expectation that Cameron should now abandon the beach, if only as a symbolic gesture, or for reasons having to do with taste, has proved impossible to eradicate, to the point that his refusal to trade a few days on a beach for a let-up in anti-vacation hostilities begins to look almost as self-harming, in image terms, as the behaviour of those tanning addicts whose compulsion has become the subject of scientific investigation.
To witness Cameron's perversity where holidays are concerned, along with the alarming depth of his tan, is to wonder if his aides might want to look out some recent research whose authors posit a connection between UV exposure and physical dependence in mice. True, being rodents rather than resolutely disengaged politicians, the experimental subjects lacked the arguments of, say, Lord Dannatt or Sir Menzies Campbell, to set against their enthusiasm for sunbathing endorphins, but the researchers nonetheless extrapolate a worrying connection, in humans, between sunshine and addictive behaviour.To witness Cameron's perversity where holidays are concerned, along with the alarming depth of his tan, is to wonder if his aides might want to look out some recent research whose authors posit a connection between UV exposure and physical dependence in mice. True, being rodents rather than resolutely disengaged politicians, the experimental subjects lacked the arguments of, say, Lord Dannatt or Sir Menzies Campbell, to set against their enthusiasm for sunbathing endorphins, but the researchers nonetheless extrapolate a worrying connection, in humans, between sunshine and addictive behaviour.
This was not, admittedly, universally accepted; one doubter, Dr David Belin, told the BBC that if people were sun-addicted: "You would have people who lose their jobs because they spend their day on the beach, people would maintain UV-seeking behaviour to the detriment of their everyday life." And it is true, Mr Cameron is still in his job, while his fellow UV fanatic, Tony Blair, continually demonstrates that UV-seeking and gainful employment can be supremely compatible.This was not, admittedly, universally accepted; one doubter, Dr David Belin, told the BBC that if people were sun-addicted: "You would have people who lose their jobs because they spend their day on the beach, people would maintain UV-seeking behaviour to the detriment of their everyday life." And it is true, Mr Cameron is still in his job, while his fellow UV fanatic, Tony Blair, continually demonstrates that UV-seeking and gainful employment can be supremely compatible.
Maybe if the public is to be reassured of his continued commitment, Mr Cameron's UV problem could be more effectively addressed as part of a spectrum of non-work-related behaviours that were prophetically summarised in James Hanning and Francis Elliott's admirable biography, as "chillaxing". Meaning to contrast Cameron, advantageously, with the obsessive Gordon Brown, their interviewee praised the former's ability to switch off, summarising his mentality thus: "I will now go into the vegetable patch, watch a crap film on telly, play with the children, cook, have three or four glasses of wine with my lunch, have an afternoon nap, play tennis."Maybe if the public is to be reassured of his continued commitment, Mr Cameron's UV problem could be more effectively addressed as part of a spectrum of non-work-related behaviours that were prophetically summarised in James Hanning and Francis Elliott's admirable biography, as "chillaxing". Meaning to contrast Cameron, advantageously, with the obsessive Gordon Brown, their interviewee praised the former's ability to switch off, summarising his mentality thus: "I will now go into the vegetable patch, watch a crap film on telly, play with the children, cook, have three or four glasses of wine with my lunch, have an afternoon nap, play tennis."
Two, at least, of these pursuits have since been illustrated: the napping in a photograph posted by a relative; the tennis by Cameron's willingness to perform, for £160,000, for the wife of a former favourite of Vladimir Putin. Which still leaves him time, it has emerged, for "addictive" video games, deer stalking, concerts by First Aid Kit, Scandi-noir TV thrillers, pub lunches and, at least in earlier days, for country suppers and hacks on Rebekah Brooks's retired police horse.Two, at least, of these pursuits have since been illustrated: the napping in a photograph posted by a relative; the tennis by Cameron's willingness to perform, for £160,000, for the wife of a former favourite of Vladimir Putin. Which still leaves him time, it has emerged, for "addictive" video games, deer stalking, concerts by First Aid Kit, Scandi-noir TV thrillers, pub lunches and, at least in earlier days, for country suppers and hacks on Rebekah Brooks's retired police horse.
The intended effect, and maybe it works in Chipping Norton, is of normality. For years, you gather, Cameron's predecessors, particularly nutty old Thatcher and Brown, exaggerated the time, sacrifices and complications of being prime minister. Either that or they failed to appreciate a modern electorate's alleged preference for leaders who are super-normal and well rested, where normal means married with childcare and a holiday is absolutely not just hanging around the pool at Chequers. "I'm a great believer that politicians are human beings and they need to have holidays," Cameron said, during a previous bout of holiday-shaming.The intended effect, and maybe it works in Chipping Norton, is of normality. For years, you gather, Cameron's predecessors, particularly nutty old Thatcher and Brown, exaggerated the time, sacrifices and complications of being prime minister. Either that or they failed to appreciate a modern electorate's alleged preference for leaders who are super-normal and well rested, where normal means married with childcare and a holiday is absolutely not just hanging around the pool at Chequers. "I'm a great believer that politicians are human beings and they need to have holidays," Cameron said, during a previous bout of holiday-shaming.
Accept his definition of human beings as the uniquely vacationing primate and we must still, surely, allow – what with leadership and with the unpredictable way of world events – that some leisure sacrifice may occasionally be required from a prime minister. If that, as he suggests, amounts to cruel deprivation, right up there with banning buggies from coffee shops, it may be that this job, far from being ideal for a young family, with its accommodation over the shop and the long, school-friendly holidays, is, like so many others, better suited to the parent of older children or, like Theresa May, of none. The very characteristic recently isolated by an anonymous Cameron ally as disadvantageous to May (since no children is not normal) might yet prove a significant asset after a prime minister whose family test is now so stringent as to keep him, even during this unprecedented crisis, no more than a few feet away from a rock pool.Accept his definition of human beings as the uniquely vacationing primate and we must still, surely, allow – what with leadership and with the unpredictable way of world events – that some leisure sacrifice may occasionally be required from a prime minister. If that, as he suggests, amounts to cruel deprivation, right up there with banning buggies from coffee shops, it may be that this job, far from being ideal for a young family, with its accommodation over the shop and the long, school-friendly holidays, is, like so many others, better suited to the parent of older children or, like Theresa May, of none. The very characteristic recently isolated by an anonymous Cameron ally as disadvantageous to May (since no children is not normal) might yet prove a significant asset after a prime minister whose family test is now so stringent as to keep him, even during this unprecedented crisis, no more than a few feet away from a rock pool.