Oh God … A perfect World Cup prayer

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/belief/2014/jun/13/oh-god-perfect-world-cup-prayer

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The age of miracles may be returning: the Church of England has done something witty and thought provoking, and issued a prayer for the England football team in the World Cup. It runs to two words and three dots. "Oh God …" is the whole of the prayer, written by Nick Baines, the bishop of Leeds.

Baines, one of the few bishops with a genuine interest in football, even if they all feel obliged to pretend to one these days, has also written four more conventional prayers for the occasion. These include a prayer for those who couldn't care less about the game, and a slightly longer one for the England team, riffing on a prayer usually said for the benefit of Bishop Richard of Chichester, who died in 1253.

The short prayer may be a translation into contemporary English of last decade's, "I was like, oh my God", which can be used to express every shade of emotion from outrage through bewilderment to perfect indifference. But the Baines translation is just as expressive: "Oh God!" is perfect. It is a prayer that can be said in many different ways, for different occasions in the game – "Oh! God!"; "Oh, GOD!"; "Ohgodohgodohgod …" – and will be used by atheists as happily as by believers.

The only possible fault with it is that we still won't win the World Cup. But at least now we have a prayer.