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You can find the current article at its original source at http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/jun/10/hipster-ice-cream-truck-invasion-artisanal-sorbet
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| We all should scream out against the hipster ice cream truck invasion | We all should scream out against the hipster ice cream truck invasion |
| (about 5 hours later) | |
| One summer when I was a kid, my family traveled to Long Island, where I saw something profoundly upsetting: an ice cream truck with garish, royal blue icicles painted above the words TASTEE TREET. It looked absolutely nothing like the ice cream trucks in my childhood neighborhood on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. The frozen novelties listed on its side were odd and unfamiliar. Its soft-serve cones and sundaes swirled out in strange, misshapen silhouettes. Clearly, something was very, very wrong. | One summer when I was a kid, my family traveled to Long Island, where I saw something profoundly upsetting: an ice cream truck with garish, royal blue icicles painted above the words TASTEE TREET. It looked absolutely nothing like the ice cream trucks in my childhood neighborhood on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. The frozen novelties listed on its side were odd and unfamiliar. Its soft-serve cones and sundaes swirled out in strange, misshapen silhouettes. Clearly, something was very, very wrong. |
| In New York City, only Mister | In New York City, only Mister |
| Softee played its insipid | Softee played its insipid |
| music-box jingle everywhere. Its trucks were identical – with the iconic, | music-box jingle everywhere. Its trucks were identical – with the iconic, |
| grinning conehead painted on one side and a lurid strawberry sundae on the | grinning conehead painted on one side and a lurid strawberry sundae on the |
| other. Little children crave consistency; Mister Softee delivered. The | other. Little children crave consistency; Mister Softee delivered. The |
| soft-serve ice cream – with its blend of sweetness, air and chemicals, topped | soft-serve ice cream – with its blend of sweetness, air and chemicals, topped |
| with candyish sprinkles or dips – was always the same. Mister Softee was ice cream to me. Simple. Affordable. | with candyish sprinkles or dips – was always the same. Mister Softee was ice cream to me. Simple. Affordable. |
| Comforting. That there could be another brand violated my entire four-year old Weltanschauung (such as it was). | |
| But, oh, had I been born a few | But, oh, had I been born a few |
| decades later, I probably would’ve been apoplectic. Yes, Mister Softee is still | decades later, I probably would’ve been apoplectic. Yes, Mister Softee is still |
| parked on corners today, but its jingle has been occasionally muted by noise | parked on corners today, but its jingle has been occasionally muted by noise |
| complaints. (Apparently, not everyone is as enamored of the famous ice cream | complaints. (Apparently, not everyone is as enamored of the famous ice cream |
| tune as myself; a few New Yorkers claimed it was literally driving them crazy | tune as myself; a few New Yorkers claimed it was literally driving them crazy |
| and threatened | and threatened |
| to sue.) And alternative ice cream trucks have popped up everywhere, | to sue.) And alternative ice cream trucks have popped up everywhere, |
| challenging Mister Softee’s primacy. | challenging Mister Softee’s primacy. |
| The Van Leeuwen Artisan Ice Cream | The Van Leeuwen Artisan Ice Cream |
| truck sells organic ice cream in such flavors as ginger, hazelnut and Earl Grey | truck sells organic ice cream in such flavors as ginger, hazelnut and Earl Grey |
| tea. Why, there’s even vegan ice cream – sold without irony or even a sly name | tea. Why, there’s even vegan ice cream – sold without irony or even a sly name |
| like “Icymoronic”. The Coolhaus truck, previously seen making star appearances | like “Icymoronic”. The Coolhaus truck, previously seen making star appearances |
| at the farmer’s market in New York’s Union Square – boasting “Architecturally | at the farmer’s market in New York’s Union Square – boasting “Architecturally |
| Inspired Gourmet Ice Cream” – has been known to offer such flavors as “Beer and | Inspired Gourmet Ice Cream” – has been known to offer such flavors as “Beer and |
| Pretzels,” “Cuban Cigar” and “Fried Chicken and Waffles.” | Pretzels,” “Cuban Cigar” and “Fried Chicken and Waffles.” |
| Itizy Ice Cream has sent a pale, | Itizy Ice Cream has sent a pale, |
| mint green vehicle out into the world that looks like an ice cream truck as | mint green vehicle out into the world that looks like an ice cream truck as |
| conceived of by Martha Stewart. And Big Gay Ice Cream? So popular that it’s | conceived of by Martha Stewart. And Big Gay Ice Cream? So popular that it’s |
| opening a shop in Los Angeles this summer. | opening a shop in Los Angeles this summer. |
| I love ice cream – all kinds of | I love ice cream – all kinds of |
| ice cream: cheap, fancy, lo-fat, hi-fat. Mass-produced, artisanal. I am an | ice cream: cheap, fancy, lo-fat, hi-fat. Mass-produced, artisanal. I am an |
| equal opportunity ice cream eater. I do not discriminate. I take no, ahem, | equal opportunity ice cream eater. I do not discriminate. I take no, ahem, |
| truck with all these local, homemade, hipster ice cream companies gaining a | truck with all these local, homemade, hipster ice cream companies gaining a |
| toehold in my hometown. I have gladly tasted their products repeatedly. | toehold in my hometown. I have gladly tasted their products repeatedly. |
| But I am profoundly attached to | But I am profoundly attached to |
| Mister Softee ice cream trucks as an institution. It’s more than simple | Mister Softee ice cream trucks as an institution. It’s more than simple |
| nostalgia. The arrival of the ice cream man used to be a communal event that | nostalgia. The arrival of the ice cream man used to be a communal event that |
| united an entire neighborhood. As soon as you heard that jingle, children who’d | united an entire neighborhood. As soon as you heard that jingle, children who’d |
| been hitting each other in the playground raced together toward the curb in a | been hitting each other in the playground raced together toward the curb in a |
| shared state of gleeful hysteria. The sole issue – the group conversation – was | shared state of gleeful hysteria. The sole issue – the group conversation – was |
| simple: chocolate or vanilla? | simple: chocolate or vanilla? |
| Now, the Bauhaus-inspired ice | Now, the Bauhaus-inspired ice |
| cream trucks offering pricey, made-to-order sandwiches, themselves inspired by | cream trucks offering pricey, made-to-order sandwiches, themselves inspired by |
| roadhouses and gourmet magazines, strike me as yet just another way that our | roadhouses and gourmet magazines, strike me as yet just another way that our |
| culture is continuing to splinter and stratify – culturally and economically. | culture is continuing to splinter and stratify – culturally and economically. |
| Yet the worst offender is not an | Yet the worst offender is not an |
| artisanal truck at all. Recently, Master | artisanal truck at all. Recently, Master |
| Softee trucks have begun appearing on the streets of New York. At first glance, | Softee trucks have begun appearing on the streets of New York. At first glance, |
| they look like Mister Softee. They even offer similar treats. But Master Softee | they look like Mister Softee. They even offer similar treats. But Master Softee |
| has a mascot with a darker shade of pointy waffle cone. Coupled with the name | has a mascot with a darker shade of pointy waffle cone. Coupled with the name |
| “Master,” this brings a whole new level of ickiness and racism to the ice cream | “Master,” this brings a whole new level of ickiness and racism to the ice cream |
| truck world. | truck world. |
| Not to mention trademark | Not to mention trademark |
| infringement. Unsurprisingly, Mister Softee is | infringement. Unsurprisingly, Mister Softee is |
| suing Master Softee. Just this past week, US District Judge Laura Taylor | suing Master Softee. Just this past week, US District Judge Laura Taylor |
| Swain granted | Swain granted |
| an injunction against Master Softee. Filed, perhaps, under the heading of “you | an injunction against Master Softee. Filed, perhaps, under the heading of “you |
| can’t make this stuff up”, she ruled that “An anthropomorphized waffle cone | can’t make this stuff up”, she ruled that “An anthropomorphized waffle cone |
| character with a blue jacket and red bow tie" featured on the competitor’s | character with a blue jacket and red bow tie" featured on the competitor’s |
| trucks could confuse ice cream buyers. | trucks could confuse ice cream buyers. |
| And so someone, finally, seems willing to defend the integrity of the beloved | And so someone, finally, seems willing to defend the integrity of the beloved |
| ice cream trucks of my childhood. In a world of rarified flavors and injustice, | ice cream trucks of my childhood. In a world of rarified flavors and injustice, |
| this, at least, is sweet. | this, at least, is sweet. |