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The rules The rules
(10 days later)
Passing the buckPassing the buck
The buck used to be passed upward through a chain of command, stopping eventually on the desk of a senior authority. This is no longer the case. There is no buck, only blame, and it is passed sideways or downwards.The buck used to be passed upward through a chain of command, stopping eventually on the desk of a senior authority. This is no longer the case. There is no buck, only blame, and it is passed sideways or downwards.
Ministers whose policies are failing, for example, should heap responsibility on their civil servants. (This is a one-way process. Ministers whose policies are judged to be working need not share any credit with the relevant officials. The inverse relationship between success of a project and sharing of credit is called Duncan Smith's Law.)Ministers whose policies are failing, for example, should heap responsibility on their civil servants. (This is a one-way process. Ministers whose policies are judged to be working need not share any credit with the relevant officials. The inverse relationship between success of a project and sharing of credit is called Duncan Smith's Law.)
If reforms to a public service go wrong, the likely culprits are trade unions for opposing the reforms in the first place. Other worthwhile targets are charities that warned that the reforms may not work. If the buck is the unit of responsibility taken by a politician, responsibility heaped on front-line staff is measured in goves.If reforms to a public service go wrong, the likely culprits are trade unions for opposing the reforms in the first place. Other worthwhile targets are charities that warned that the reforms may not work. If the buck is the unit of responsibility taken by a politician, responsibility heaped on front-line staff is measured in goves.
If in doubt who is to blame for things going wrong, use this handy guide.If in doubt who is to blame for things going wrong, use this handy guide.
Problem: there is a horrible war, nobody knows what to do about it.
Blame: Tony Blair.
Problem: there is a horrible war, nobody knows what to do about it.
Blame: Tony Blair.
Problem: something is not right with the economy.
Blame: Gordon Brown.
Problem: something is not right with the economy.
Blame: Gordon Brown.
Problem: public services don't work properly.
Blame: immigrants (Tory/Ukip variant); the Cuts (Labour variant).
Problem: public services don't work properly.
Blame: immigrants (Tory/Ukip variant); the Cuts (Labour variant).
Problem: everything in the country is rubbish.
Blame: Europe (rightwing variant); neo-liberalism (leftwing variant).
Problem: everything in the country is rubbish.
Blame: Europe (rightwing variant); neo-liberalism (leftwing variant).
Problem: the people have not answered the call of destiny and risen up against David Cameron.
Blame: the media; Ed Miliband.
Problem: the people have not answered the call of destiny and risen up against David Cameron.
Blame: the media; Ed Miliband.
Problem: miscellaneous political dissatisfaction.
Blame: Nick Clegg.
Problem: miscellaneous political dissatisfaction.
Blame: Nick Clegg.
Do you need a Smart Watch?Do you need a Smart Watch?
Keeping up with the latest advances in technology can be financially debilitating. You already have a desktop computer, a laptop, a tablet and a smart phone. Ask yourself whether insufficient opportunity to be distracted from urgent tasks by the internet is really a problem you should be trying to solve. (Better still, ask Siri. Or Twitter.)Keeping up with the latest advances in technology can be financially debilitating. You already have a desktop computer, a laptop, a tablet and a smart phone. Ask yourself whether insufficient opportunity to be distracted from urgent tasks by the internet is really a problem you should be trying to solve. (Better still, ask Siri. Or Twitter.)
To establish whether you need a new piece of tech hardware, first calculate the age of your existing equipment. Desktops and laptops age at a rate of 12 computer years to one human year. So your four-year-old MacBook is having a midlife crisis; your eight-year-old PC is painfully slow, has no memory and is lucky to be alive at all. The average lifespan of a smart phone is statistically immeasurable because they are too accident-prone and rarely die of natural causes. In marketing terms, people who insist on having every new piece of technology as soon as possible are called early adopters. This label only applies if there are late adopters, too. Early adopters of flops such as Betamax videos and the Sinclair C5 are just mugs.To establish whether you need a new piece of tech hardware, first calculate the age of your existing equipment. Desktops and laptops age at a rate of 12 computer years to one human year. So your four-year-old MacBook is having a midlife crisis; your eight-year-old PC is painfully slow, has no memory and is lucky to be alive at all. The average lifespan of a smart phone is statistically immeasurable because they are too accident-prone and rarely die of natural causes. In marketing terms, people who insist on having every new piece of technology as soon as possible are called early adopters. This label only applies if there are late adopters, too. Early adopters of flops such as Betamax videos and the Sinclair C5 are just mugs.
Never queue outside a shop for a new technological release. Your only socially credible options are to order one online, wait until there is no queue or be a smug industry insider and get one early.Never queue outside a shop for a new technological release. Your only socially credible options are to order one online, wait until there is no queue or be a smug industry insider and get one early.
As for the specific question of a smart watch, ask yourself the following question: what time is it? If the answer was furnished by a device already in place on your wrist then your watch is probably smart enough already.As for the specific question of a smart watch, ask yourself the following question: what time is it? If the answer was furnished by a device already in place on your wrist then your watch is probably smart enough already.
Correcting attacks on Britain's national prideCorrecting attacks on Britain's national pride
Vladimir Putin's spokesman called the UK "a small island that nobody listens to". This gross mischaracterisation has rightly been the cause of great patriotic outrage. By any reasonable measure of land mass and diplomatic status, Britain is a medium-sized island that some people listen to.Vladimir Putin's spokesman called the UK "a small island that nobody listens to". This gross mischaracterisation has rightly been the cause of great patriotic outrage. By any reasonable measure of land mass and diplomatic status, Britain is a medium-sized island that some people listen to.
Cliff Richard's persistent lack of a revivalCliff Richard's persistent lack of a revival
Sir Cliff Richard will soon be releasing his 100th album. He has been deeply unfashionable for more than a generation, suggesting he should be due for a revival, if not in the music industry then at least as an ironic statement on hipster T-shirts.Sir Cliff Richard will soon be releasing his 100th album. He has been deeply unfashionable for more than a generation, suggesting he should be due for a revival, if not in the music industry then at least as an ironic statement on hipster T-shirts.
TwerkingTwerking
Over as soon as it began. Any reference is now the cultural equivalent of the warning tape that police string across the scene of accidents. Move along quickly, nothing to see.Over as soon as it began. Any reference is now the cultural equivalent of the warning tape that police string across the scene of accidents. Move along quickly, nothing to see.
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