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Cameron looks a fool over Syria – but whose fault would that be? Cameron looks a fool over Syria – but whose fault would that be?
(14 days later)
Clegg: I can't really say whether I would or would not let the US use the UK as a missile base.Clegg: I can't really say whether I would or would not let the US use the UK as a missile base.
Cameron: Who let this idiot sum up the debate?Cameron: Who let this idiot sum up the debate?
Hague: I did.Hague: I did.
The Speaker: Tough shit, Dave. You've lost the vote.The Speaker: Tough shit, Dave. You've lost the vote.
Cameron: How the hell did you screw up so badly?Cameron: How the hell did you screw up so badly?
Tory whips: To be fair, it wasn't just us.Tory whips: To be fair, it wasn't just us.
Cameron: And where the hell were you?Cameron: And where the hell were you?
Justine Greening: I'm really, really, really sorry. The dog ate my homework. And then my granny died.Justine Greening: I'm really, really, really sorry. The dog ate my homework. And then my granny died.
Cameron: And you, Milidee. You're a fucking cunt. You're more interested in scoring personal political points than helping the Syrian people.Cameron: And you, Milidee. You're a fucking cunt. You're more interested in scoring personal political points than helping the Syrian people.
Milidee: That makes two of us, then.Milidee: That makes two of us, then.
Philip Hammond: By voting not to start a war we might not be able to end, we have given a clear message to Saddam Hussein that he can do what he likes.Philip Hammond: By voting not to start a war we might not be able to end, we have given a clear message to Saddam Hussein that he can do what he likes.
Everyone: Er, Saddam was hanged nearly seven years ago.Everyone: Er, Saddam was hanged nearly seven years ago.
Hammond: Really? No one told me.Hammond: Really? No one told me.
Paddy Ashdown: I've never felt so ashamed.Paddy Ashdown: I've never felt so ashamed.
Lady Ashdown: Would you care to think a little harder about that, Lord Pantsdown?Lady Ashdown: Would you care to think a little harder about that, Lord Pantsdown?
Obama: I'd like to say "Bonjour" to my new best friend, France Europe.Obama: I'd like to say "Bonjour" to my new best friend, France Europe.
France: You quoi?France: You quoi?
Some MPs: Can we just confirm whether the UK actually sold chemical agents to Syria?Some MPs: Can we just confirm whether the UK actually sold chemical agents to Syria?
Cameron: Oh yes. Bashar told me he had a terrible snail problem in his back garden.Cameron: Oh yes. Bashar told me he had a terrible snail problem in his back garden.
Milidee: Now that you've been made to look a complete fool, can we have another vote if it looks like rather more of the British public fancy getting involved in Syria?Milidee: Now that you've been made to look a complete fool, can we have another vote if it looks like rather more of the British public fancy getting involved in Syria?
Cameron: Are you totally mad? We never really wanted to get into a big spat with Bashar anyway. We certainly don't want him ousted as then we just let the al-Qaeda and Muslim Brotherhood johnnies in. We just wanted to send him a bit of a warning that gassing his people was a red line but that if he wanted to go back to gunning them down indiscriminately it was fine by us.Cameron: Are you totally mad? We never really wanted to get into a big spat with Bashar anyway. We certainly don't want him ousted as then we just let the al-Qaeda and Muslim Brotherhood johnnies in. We just wanted to send him a bit of a warning that gassing his people was a red line but that if he wanted to go back to gunning them down indiscriminately it was fine by us.
Clegg: It is rather wonderful to have the moral high ground, isn't it Daddy?Clegg: It is rather wonderful to have the moral high ground, isn't it Daddy?
Cameron: It certainly is. I'm just sorry the world hasn't had the opportunity to realise just how moral we really are.Cameron: It certainly is. I'm just sorry the world hasn't had the opportunity to realise just how moral we really are.
The world: Don't worry. We know enough about your morality.The world: Don't worry. We know enough about your morality.
GMB Union: We're going to reduce our donation to the Labour party by £1m at Christmas.GMB Union: We're going to reduce our donation to the Labour party by £1m at Christmas.
Milidee: £1m is loose change to me these days. I say we bomb Syria anyway.Milidee: £1m is loose change to me these days. I say we bomb Syria anyway.
Blair: That's my boy.Blair: That's my boy.
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