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How can you make driving more antisocial than it already is? How can you make driving more antisocial than it already is?
(4 months later)
There can be few tautologies purer than the phrase "antisocial motoring". Nothing could be more antisocial than locking oneself into a steel box before hurtling down a Tarmac scar, cleaving urban and rural communities or unspoiled natural havens, past children held tight in the fearful grip of nervous parents while you fart toxic fumes in their general direction. Of course driving is antisocial – if we didn't actively want to be antisocial we would catch the bloody bus.There can be few tautologies purer than the phrase "antisocial motoring". Nothing could be more antisocial than locking oneself into a steel box before hurtling down a Tarmac scar, cleaving urban and rural communities or unspoiled natural havens, past children held tight in the fearful grip of nervous parents while you fart toxic fumes in their general direction. Of course driving is antisocial – if we didn't actively want to be antisocial we would catch the bloody bus.
Nonetheless, the ludicrous phrase has been all over the papers today. The transport minister Stephen Hammond has announced that police will soon be able to issue on-the-spot fines for a range of offences that often go unpunished at present, largely due to the bureaucracy involved for officers in pursuing court proceedings.Nonetheless, the ludicrous phrase has been all over the papers today. The transport minister Stephen Hammond has announced that police will soon be able to issue on-the-spot fines for a range of offences that often go unpunished at present, largely due to the bureaucracy involved for officers in pursuing court proceedings.
When politicians and press talk of antisocial driving, they mostly mean criminal offences committed from behind a wheel. With five people killed and 63 seriously injured on British roads every single day, it does no one any favours to conjure up euphemisms. If fixed-penalty notices help to curtail drivers' most dangerous habits, there will be no complaints from me. If they infuriate the spluttering berks who considers speed cameras to be an Orwellian infringement of their sacred right to drive like angry rhinos, then so much the better.When politicians and press talk of antisocial driving, they mostly mean criminal offences committed from behind a wheel. With five people killed and 63 seriously injured on British roads every single day, it does no one any favours to conjure up euphemisms. If fixed-penalty notices help to curtail drivers' most dangerous habits, there will be no complaints from me. If they infuriate the spluttering berks who considers speed cameras to be an Orwellian infringement of their sacred right to drive like angry rhinos, then so much the better.
Being a bit of an antisocial bastard myself, and periodically being pulled kicking and screaming into what some laughably call the real world, I do drive a car. I've taken my occasional speeding points or bus lane fine with traditional bad grace and expletives, but my anger is invariably self-directed. I wasn't being antisocial, I was breaking (sensible) laws. It's a fair cop.Being a bit of an antisocial bastard myself, and periodically being pulled kicking and screaming into what some laughably call the real world, I do drive a car. I've taken my occasional speeding points or bus lane fine with traditional bad grace and expletives, but my anger is invariably self-directed. I wasn't being antisocial, I was breaking (sensible) laws. It's a fair cop.
Antisocial behaviour was originally a concept invented to describe behaviour that is harmful or a nuisance to others while falling short of criminality. To make driving any more antisocial than it is by nature – without actually transgressing any laws – requires some effort. Picking one's nose at traffic lights is an obvious candidate, so too is stripping off a business shirt and applying deodorant to naked, sweaty oxters. Please madam, your dignity. Any driver who fails to raise four perfunctory fingers of gratitude when you stop and let them through should be made to eat a copy of the Highway Code.Antisocial behaviour was originally a concept invented to describe behaviour that is harmful or a nuisance to others while falling short of criminality. To make driving any more antisocial than it is by nature – without actually transgressing any laws – requires some effort. Picking one's nose at traffic lights is an obvious candidate, so too is stripping off a business shirt and applying deodorant to naked, sweaty oxters. Please madam, your dignity. Any driver who fails to raise four perfunctory fingers of gratitude when you stop and let them through should be made to eat a copy of the Highway Code.
Traffic jams offer the best opportunities for bad behaviour. I recommend releasing a small child and getting him or her to tap on the windows of nearby cars to ask: "Are we nearly there yet?" The comedian Dave Allen once suggested you should wait until the driver ahead has nodded off or buried him/herself in a newspaper. You give a quick beep of the horn then watch as he or she assumes the traffic has moved off and instinctively accelerates straight into the bumper of the car in front. Now that's what I call antisocial behaviour (don't try this at home, kids.)Traffic jams offer the best opportunities for bad behaviour. I recommend releasing a small child and getting him or her to tap on the windows of nearby cars to ask: "Are we nearly there yet?" The comedian Dave Allen once suggested you should wait until the driver ahead has nodded off or buried him/herself in a newspaper. You give a quick beep of the horn then watch as he or she assumes the traffic has moved off and instinctively accelerates straight into the bumper of the car in front. Now that's what I call antisocial behaviour (don't try this at home, kids.)
It's easy to be annoyed at drivers who hog the middle lane, hover inches from your tail at high speeds or cut across you at a junction, but what petty annoyances would have you calling for an antisocial motoring order? The transport secretary might not want to know, but I do.It's easy to be annoyed at drivers who hog the middle lane, hover inches from your tail at high speeds or cut across you at a junction, but what petty annoyances would have you calling for an antisocial motoring order? The transport secretary might not want to know, but I do.
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