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King Juan Carlos of Spain: a man of sacrifice King Juan Carlos of Spain: a man of sacrifice
(4 months later)
Name: King Juan Carlos of Spain.Name: King Juan Carlos of Spain.
Age: 75.Age: 75.
Appearance: Barely regal.Appearance: Barely regal.
King who? King Juan Carlos of Spain.King who? King Juan Carlos of Spain.
Oh right. What's he done now? Given up his yacht.Oh right. What's he done now? Given up his yacht.
Aww. Sad. Because he's getting too old to sail? No, it's not that kind of yacht. It's the other kind. The kind that's 136ft long, worth £18m and costs around £17,000 to refuel.Aww. Sad. Because he's getting too old to sail? No, it's not that kind of yacht. It's the other kind. The kind that's 136ft long, worth £18m and costs around £17,000 to refuel.
Ah. The kind a king gets. Yep, and the kind that, arguably, looks a little bit too lavish for the monarch of a country with a 27% unemployment rate. Especially when his popularity ratings have plummeted in the wake of a string of royal scandals and embarrassments.Ah. The kind a king gets. Yep, and the kind that, arguably, looks a little bit too lavish for the monarch of a country with a 27% unemployment rate. Especially when his popularity ratings have plummeted in the wake of a string of royal scandals and embarrassments.
Such as? Such as last April, when the king – then the honorary president of the World Wildlife Fund (WWF) in Spain – was caught jetting off to Botswana for a secret elephant-hunting safari at an estimated cost of £8,000 a day.Such as? Such as last April, when the king – then the honorary president of the World Wildlife Fund (WWF) in Spain – was caught jetting off to Botswana for a secret elephant-hunting safari at an estimated cost of £8,000 a day.
And? And a corruption probe into the charity run by the king's son-in-law Iñaki Urdangarin, Duke of Palma, from 2004 to 2006, from which Urdangarin is alleged to have siphoned money intended for disabled children into off-shore bank accounts.And? And a corruption probe into the charity run by the king's son-in-law Iñaki Urdangarin, Duke of Palma, from 2004 to 2006, from which Urdangarin is alleged to have siphoned money intended for disabled children into off-shore bank accounts.
And? And the fact some of his family have really shot themselves in the foot.And? And the fact some of his family have really shot themselves in the foot.
In what sense? In the sense that just before the king's safari his 13-year-old grandson Froilán Marichalar literally shot himself in the foot with a shotgun.In what sense? In the sense that just before the king's safari his 13-year-old grandson Froilán Marichalar literally shot himself in the foot with a shotgun.
Which is a scandal why? Because, according to Spanish newspapers, the law, and basic common sense, 13 is too young to be firing a shotgun at your own feet or anyone else's. Prompting allegations that the royals feel the normal rules don't apply to them.Which is a scandal why? Because, according to Spanish newspapers, the law, and basic common sense, 13 is too young to be firing a shotgun at your own feet or anyone else's. Prompting allegations that the royals feel the normal rules don't apply to them.
And do they? Yep. Because they don't. King Juan Carlos is literally above the law. Two people claiming to be his illegitimate offspring have had attempts to prove his paternity thrown out of court on the grounds of his legal "inviolability".And do they? Yep. Because they don't. King Juan Carlos is literally above the law. Two people claiming to be his illegitimate offspring have had attempts to prove his paternity thrown out of court on the grounds of his legal "inviolability".
Ah. Well then I'm not so bothered he's lost his yacht. To be fair, he's probably not too bothered either. He can still go shoot an elephant with impunity.Ah. Well then I'm not so bothered he's lost his yacht. To be fair, he's probably not too bothered either. He can still go shoot an elephant with impunity.
Do say: "We're all in this together."Do say: "We're all in this together."
Don't say: "But some of us are more in it together than others."Don't say: "But some of us are more in it together than others."
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