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'Family comes first' - carer, 15 'Family comes first' - carer, 15
(about 5 hours later)
By Katherine Sellgren BBC News education reporter Television adverts for the charity Action for Children raise awarenessBy Katherine Sellgren BBC News education reporter Television adverts for the charity Action for Children raise awareness
Young carers in England are often "unidentified, unsupported and without a voice", Ofsted inspectors say. So what is a childhood of care really like?Young carers in England are often "unidentified, unsupported and without a voice", Ofsted inspectors say. So what is a childhood of care really like?
"I help cook and clean, I do the ironing and - to give my mum and dad a break - I play with the other kids, I help my sister with her homework and I help the others with their homework too.""I help cook and clean, I do the ironing and - to give my mum and dad a break - I play with the other kids, I help my sister with her homework and I help the others with their homework too."
At the age of 15, Melissa from south Wales has a lot more on her plate than most of her peers who are sitting GCSEs this summer. At the age of 15, Melissa, from south Wales has a lot more on her plate than most of her peers who are sitting GCSEs this summer.
But she has made every effort to keep up her attendance at school and hopes to study English and history A-levels from September.But she has made every effort to keep up her attendance at school and hopes to study English and history A-levels from September.
She would also love to go on to university.She would also love to go on to university.
"I don't know if that will be possible - but I'd like to go.""I don't know if that will be possible - but I'd like to go."
I do get angry sometimes... but at the end of the day my family comes first. Melissa, 15I do get angry sometimes... but at the end of the day my family comes first. Melissa, 15
The eldest of four children, Melissa helps care for her nine-year-old epileptic sister and her 14-year-old autistic brother.The eldest of four children, Melissa helps care for her nine-year-old epileptic sister and her 14-year-old autistic brother.
She also helps look after her four-year-old sister, as well as her mother and father, who both have heart problems.She also helps look after her four-year-old sister, as well as her mother and father, who both have heart problems.
"When I was younger, I used to do really simple things," says Melissa."When I was younger, I used to do really simple things," says Melissa.
"It's got harder as I've got older because I've been able to take more responsibility and I'm more capable now that I'm older.""It's got harder as I've got older because I've been able to take more responsibility and I'm more capable now that I'm older."
'Angry''Angry'
"I do get angry sometimes because I miss out going out with my friends - but at the end of the day my family comes first.""I do get angry sometimes because I miss out going out with my friends - but at the end of the day my family comes first."
When she is told she sounds very mature for a 15-year-old, she says: "I've had to be."When she is told she sounds very mature for a 15-year-old, she says: "I've had to be."
Melissa says her school does not know about her caring role and she is happier with it that way, because she does not want to be singled out.Melissa says her school does not know about her caring role and she is happier with it that way, because she does not want to be singled out.
"I'd rather not tell them, I fear I'd be treated differently."I'd rather not tell them, I fear I'd be treated differently.
"I wouldn't mind the teachers knowing, but I wouldn't like to be treated differently - I'd like to be like a normal child.""I wouldn't mind the teachers knowing, but I wouldn't like to be treated differently - I'd like to be like a normal child."
Melissa's lifeline has been a support group, run by the charity Action for Children, called Rhondda Taff Ely Young Carers.Melissa's lifeline has been a support group, run by the charity Action for Children, called Rhondda Taff Ely Young Carers.
For the past seven years this has offered her a break every fortnight and the chance to "chill out" with other young people who face similarly challenging childhoods.For the past seven years this has offered her a break every fortnight and the chance to "chill out" with other young people who face similarly challenging childhoods.
"It's got to be the best help help I've had out of all the services, like social workers and things like that," she says."It's got to be the best help help I've had out of all the services, like social workers and things like that," she says.
Nicola's storyNicola's story
Nicola King from Scotland tells a similar story of a childhood taken up with adult cares and responsibilities. Nicola King from North Lanarkshire tells a similar story of a childhood taken up with adult cares and responsibilities.
She was just eight when her mother became ill with multiple sclerosis.She was just eight when her mother became ill with multiple sclerosis.
Nicola King now helps others who have had a childhood of caringNicola King now helps others who have had a childhood of caring
"It was just me and my mum so I took on quite a heavy amount of the caring - cooking, cleaning, shopping, financial stuff, helping with her medication," says Nicola."It was just me and my mum so I took on quite a heavy amount of the caring - cooking, cleaning, shopping, financial stuff, helping with her medication," says Nicola.
"When she lost all of her abilities, I was changing her catheter bag and taking her to the toilet."When she lost all of her abilities, I was changing her catheter bag and taking her to the toilet.
"Basically I just got on with it - I was an eight-year-old girl one day and I woke up the next day as an eight-year-old adult.""Basically I just got on with it - I was an eight-year-old girl one day and I woke up the next day as an eight-year-old adult."
Her caring duties only ended when her mother died when Nicola was 16.Her caring duties only ended when her mother died when Nicola was 16.
The whole experience, Nicola reflects, has made her more mature for her now 25 years.The whole experience, Nicola reflects, has made her more mature for her now 25 years.
"I am a lot more mature than a lot of my peers."I am a lot more mature than a lot of my peers.
"My boyfriend laughs and tells me to act my age - but I tell him 'You forget I never had a childhood'"."My boyfriend laughs and tells me to act my age - but I tell him 'You forget I never had a childhood'".
Her story was so poignant, it was used as one of the television adverts by the charity Action for Children in its awareness-raising campaign for young carers.Her story was so poignant, it was used as one of the television adverts by the charity Action for Children in its awareness-raising campaign for young carers.
Now aged 25, Melissa works with child carers, giving them support, the chance to chat and, most importantly, the chance to have some fun. Nicola now works with child carers, giving them support, the chance to chat and, most importantly, the chance to have some fun.