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| Archbishop urges parents re-think | Archbishop urges parents re-think |
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| Attitudes towards parenting need a radical re-think, the Archbishop of Wales has said. | Attitudes towards parenting need a radical re-think, the Archbishop of Wales has said. |
| In a speech to the Church in Wales' governing body in Llandudno, Dr Barry Morgan said parents must work hard to spend quality time with their children. | In a speech to the Church in Wales' governing body in Llandudno, Dr Barry Morgan said parents must work hard to spend quality time with their children. |
| He said: "In our busyness and self-absorption we have simply lost sight of the big picture." | He said: "In our busyness and self-absorption we have simply lost sight of the big picture." |
| Dr Morgan said children were facing "huge social problems" and growing up in a society which fostered "greed". | Dr Morgan said children were facing "huge social problems" and growing up in a society which fostered "greed". |
| Parents should be given help and advice to support them through difficult times, Dr Morgan added. | Parents should be given help and advice to support them through difficult times, Dr Morgan added. |
| "Comfortable Britain" | "Comfortable Britain" |
| Dr Morgan said: "The recession is not something we can lay at the door of 'them' - the drunken youngsters, unmarried mothers, knife-carrying youths, anti-social gangs..." | Dr Morgan said: "The recession is not something we can lay at the door of 'them' - the drunken youngsters, unmarried mothers, knife-carrying youths, anti-social gangs..." |
| "Its causes well and truly belong to 'us' - comfortable Britain." | "Its causes well and truly belong to 'us' - comfortable Britain." |
| Parents may know the "real needs" of children, said Dr Morgan, but "frequently refuse to recognise that these often come at a personal cost to our own needs and desires - be they compromises in our earning capacity or career development, or commitment to work at a relationship. | Parents may know the "real needs" of children, said Dr Morgan, but "frequently refuse to recognise that these often come at a personal cost to our own needs and desires - be they compromises in our earning capacity or career development, or commitment to work at a relationship. |
| Children are the "responsibility of both parents", who should work hard to prevent family break-ups, he said. | Children are the "responsibility of both parents", who should work hard to prevent family break-ups, he said. |
| Dr Morgan, 62, who is married with two children, said he had been to parenting classes in his local parish when his children were teenagers. | |
| He said: "I am not saying that a woman's place is in the home. Fathers are no less important than mothers in a child's life. | |
| "Nor am I saying that parents must stay together at all costs. | "Nor am I saying that parents must stay together at all costs. |
| "Where there is a high level of conflict that cannot be resolved, or an abusive relationship, the child would obviously be better served if the parents separate." | "Where there is a high level of conflict that cannot be resolved, or an abusive relationship, the child would obviously be better served if the parents separate." |
| "Parent-craft" | "Parent-craft" |
| He said children and young people are facing "huge social problems", exacerbated by the credit crunch, because they are growing up in a society that fosters "greed and individualism". | He said children and young people are facing "huge social problems", exacerbated by the credit crunch, because they are growing up in a society that fosters "greed and individualism". |
| Turning to sex education, Dr Morgan said: "We have the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe." | Turning to sex education, Dr Morgan said: "We have the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe." |
| He said that schoolchildren should be taught about the commitment and responsibility involved in parenting, alongside education about sex and contraception. | He said that schoolchildren should be taught about the commitment and responsibility involved in parenting, alongside education about sex and contraception. |
| Dr Morgan said: "We need to be teaching these basic concepts, as well as parent-craft, from an early age. | Dr Morgan said: "We need to be teaching these basic concepts, as well as parent-craft, from an early age. |
| "Particularly to those who have not experienced it first hand, and not simply informing them about the mechanics of a sexual relationship and contraception divorced from the basic concepts of love, responsibility and self-respect." | "Particularly to those who have not experienced it first hand, and not simply informing them about the mechanics of a sexual relationship and contraception divorced from the basic concepts of love, responsibility and self-respect." |
| What do you think of the Archbishop of Wales' comments? Does parenting need an re-think? We will publish a selection of your comments. | What do you think of the Archbishop of Wales' comments? Does parenting need an re-think? We will publish a selection of your comments. |
| I think Dr Barry Morgan is absolutely accurate to address the cause of our current culture and economy instabilities as stemming from individual and family levels. It is too easy to place blame on higher-level social groups or institutions such as the bankers or the government, which is right to some extent, but we must face up to our own failures to take responsibilities and reflect honestly on our own lifestyles and values. I think underlying many of our environmental issues and financial issues is the attitude of greed and self-interest, and in order to face these important issues we need to address the very personal evils, as well as the systematic ones. The confrontation of our problems has become the only adequate response, for denial, despair, or inaction are no longer options, and this must include the important familial levels. Addressing these issues is the best way to change the world for the better. Each of us needs to be empowered, to properly value our responsibilities to each other, to our society and to the wider, international community, and at the same time abandon self-interest and self-promotion, by putting others first to form a world-wide community that would best-benefit all. Carla, Durham | I think Dr Barry Morgan is absolutely accurate to address the cause of our current culture and economy instabilities as stemming from individual and family levels. It is too easy to place blame on higher-level social groups or institutions such as the bankers or the government, which is right to some extent, but we must face up to our own failures to take responsibilities and reflect honestly on our own lifestyles and values. I think underlying many of our environmental issues and financial issues is the attitude of greed and self-interest, and in order to face these important issues we need to address the very personal evils, as well as the systematic ones. The confrontation of our problems has become the only adequate response, for denial, despair, or inaction are no longer options, and this must include the important familial levels. Addressing these issues is the best way to change the world for the better. Each of us needs to be empowered, to properly value our responsibilities to each other, to our society and to the wider, international community, and at the same time abandon self-interest and self-promotion, by putting others first to form a world-wide community that would best-benefit all. Carla, Durham |
| I think he should be given first prize in the 'stating the blinking obvious' category...Why is it that we give a platform to these people who either have nothing of use to say, or worse, advocate ridiculous adherence to antiquated dogma. David Edwards, Aberdare | I think he should be given first prize in the 'stating the blinking obvious' category...Why is it that we give a platform to these people who either have nothing of use to say, or worse, advocate ridiculous adherence to antiquated dogma. David Edwards, Aberdare |
| In response to Mr. Edwards' comment, I would highlight the fact that many people are clearly unaware of the 'obviousness' of Dr. Morgan's advice (why do you think that the Jeremy Kyle Show is so popular?). In particular, I think that the Archbishop's point regarding the importance of responsibility and self-respect is worth taking on board. That his ideas on the subject are based on his religious beliefs is unimportant; they are suggestions grounded also in common sense - and, evidently, experience - which are not in the least dogmatic.Jon, Staines, UK | In response to Mr. Edwards' comment, I would highlight the fact that many people are clearly unaware of the 'obviousness' of Dr. Morgan's advice (why do you think that the Jeremy Kyle Show is so popular?). In particular, I think that the Archbishop's point regarding the importance of responsibility and self-respect is worth taking on board. That his ideas on the subject are based on his religious beliefs is unimportant; they are suggestions grounded also in common sense - and, evidently, experience - which are not in the least dogmatic.Jon, Staines, UK |
| I absolutely agree. What an intelligent and perceptive man! At last, a sensible, honest and constructive set of thoughts and ideas to take and put into action. We should all be challenged from this to be better at raising our children.EKPhillips, Essex, UK | I absolutely agree. What an intelligent and perceptive man! At last, a sensible, honest and constructive set of thoughts and ideas to take and put into action. We should all be challenged from this to be better at raising our children.EKPhillips, Essex, UK |
| Unfortunately this government is seeking to place itself and its mechanisms firmly between parents and children. The nationalisation of childhood is very much on the agenda and turning children into efficient consumer units is one of the aims. Not sure of this? You only have to follow the legislation and proposed legislation regarding children, welfare, parents, databases, health etc to see this is what we are creeping towards.Elaine, Derby, UK | Unfortunately this government is seeking to place itself and its mechanisms firmly between parents and children. The nationalisation of childhood is very much on the agenda and turning children into efficient consumer units is one of the aims. Not sure of this? You only have to follow the legislation and proposed legislation regarding children, welfare, parents, databases, health etc to see this is what we are creeping towards.Elaine, Derby, UK |
| Why give a platform to people like the Archbishop? Because what we are doing now simply is not working. Could it be a good idea to have another look at all that 'antiquated dagma'?Gerhard Zierl, La Oliva, Spain | Why give a platform to people like the Archbishop? Because what we are doing now simply is not working. Could it be a good idea to have another look at all that 'antiquated dagma'?Gerhard Zierl, La Oliva, Spain |
| Since when has being married mother made you a better mother!! Its comments like these that further cause single mothers (like myself) to have a battering from society. I have no 'real friends' because of what society thinks of us but I'm the one who takes out the children of married couples because they don't have time for their own. Stop condemning us. Lynne, Gwent | Since when has being married mother made you a better mother!! Its comments like these that further cause single mothers (like myself) to have a battering from society. I have no 'real friends' because of what society thinks of us but I'm the one who takes out the children of married couples because they don't have time for their own. Stop condemning us. Lynne, Gwent |
| I totally agree and its what i have been thinking myself.Haaris Ahmed, L'pool | I totally agree and its what i have been thinking myself.Haaris Ahmed, L'pool |
| I resent the implication that as an unmarried mother I am in a category of what Dr Morgan seems to feel is unacceptable parents. Not to mention the fact that he omitted unmarried fathers (who I feel may do a fantastic job of bringing up their children). The children's father and I have a healthy relationship whereby we teach our children right and wrong, how to be good citizens and put others before themselves. We work alongside school to give them an education about all matters - and that includes informing our children that some individuals have pre-conceptions and wholly categorise individuals. We are just that - individual. By what evidence does Dr Morgan feel that unmarried mothers are in the same category (" 'them' ") as knife-carrying youths? Does Dr Morgan therefore think that ALL married couples (especially very unhappy ones - as according to him we should try to stay together) do a splendid job of bringing up their children? I feel that bringing up children in a very unhappy and unhealthy relationship could be more damaging to the children in the family than separation. We can, and we do, teach our children to know that they do not have to follow what society allegedly promotes - greed and individualism. There are many things that we teach our children in the hope that they will become respectable adults. That is our responsibility. However, having someone blatantly characterise unmarried mothers in such a demeaning way is unacceptable societal behaviour in itself, that appears somewhat righteous. I would certainly have liked to have seen the entire transcript of this interview.Karen Wikholm, Preston, Lancashire | I resent the implication that as an unmarried mother I am in a category of what Dr Morgan seems to feel is unacceptable parents. Not to mention the fact that he omitted unmarried fathers (who I feel may do a fantastic job of bringing up their children). The children's father and I have a healthy relationship whereby we teach our children right and wrong, how to be good citizens and put others before themselves. We work alongside school to give them an education about all matters - and that includes informing our children that some individuals have pre-conceptions and wholly categorise individuals. We are just that - individual. By what evidence does Dr Morgan feel that unmarried mothers are in the same category (" 'them' ") as knife-carrying youths? Does Dr Morgan therefore think that ALL married couples (especially very unhappy ones - as according to him we should try to stay together) do a splendid job of bringing up their children? I feel that bringing up children in a very unhappy and unhealthy relationship could be more damaging to the children in the family than separation. We can, and we do, teach our children to know that they do not have to follow what society allegedly promotes - greed and individualism. There are many things that we teach our children in the hope that they will become respectable adults. That is our responsibility. However, having someone blatantly characterise unmarried mothers in such a demeaning way is unacceptable societal behaviour in itself, that appears somewhat righteous. I would certainly have liked to have seen the entire transcript of this interview.Karen Wikholm, Preston, Lancashire |
| Unfortunately our Government doesn't take this view. Ask any of the thousands of home educators - especially the single parents - who are struggling against all odds by "going against the flow" and commit ourselves to the raising and educating of our children instead of delegating this to the state.Ann Newstead, Kent, UK | Unfortunately our Government doesn't take this view. Ask any of the thousands of home educators - especially the single parents - who are struggling against all odds by "going against the flow" and commit ourselves to the raising and educating of our children instead of delegating this to the state.Ann Newstead, Kent, UK |
| The government dont make it easy - they force mothers to work with huge financial incentive ie tax credits . However I'm adamant that i remain at home with my two - problem is money is very very tight ... which causes stress and means holidays are out the question. Also I think being a single mother would make it easier to be a better parent - not harder . Think about it - all your attention goes on your children . I think in some ways this guy is right but a bit short sighted . Instead of condeming us parents - especially mothers, how about pushing the government to value families . Greed is wrong - but there's nowt wrong with a bit of individualism . At the end of the day once your kiddies have left home - do you want to be left with nothing ? Parents are humans too and have needs . Happy fufilled parents can do a better job than souless overworked ones .tims wife, glasgow | The government dont make it easy - they force mothers to work with huge financial incentive ie tax credits . However I'm adamant that i remain at home with my two - problem is money is very very tight ... which causes stress and means holidays are out the question. Also I think being a single mother would make it easier to be a better parent - not harder . Think about it - all your attention goes on your children . I think in some ways this guy is right but a bit short sighted . Instead of condeming us parents - especially mothers, how about pushing the government to value families . Greed is wrong - but there's nowt wrong with a bit of individualism . At the end of the day once your kiddies have left home - do you want to be left with nothing ? Parents are humans too and have needs . Happy fufilled parents can do a better job than souless overworked ones .tims wife, glasgow |
| Maybe the Archbishop should take a look at what happened to the generations before instead of condemning the youngsters of today and maybe the media should start looking at the good the young people of today do, instead of the focus on the anti-social yobs! Im a single parent, training to be a youth counsellor, running a youth club - I am with young people every single day, on the ground level actually working with them to empower tem to turn their lives around! I wonder what 'label' he would like to give me.Julia Swallow, Caerphilly | Maybe the Archbishop should take a look at what happened to the generations before instead of condemning the youngsters of today and maybe the media should start looking at the good the young people of today do, instead of the focus on the anti-social yobs! Im a single parent, training to be a youth counsellor, running a youth club - I am with young people every single day, on the ground level actually working with them to empower tem to turn their lives around! I wonder what 'label' he would like to give me.Julia Swallow, Caerphilly |
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