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| A mum's 'dark' Hillsborough day | A mum's 'dark' Hillsborough day |
| (40 minutes later) | |
| A-level student John McBrien was one of the 96 fans crushed to death | A-level student John McBrien was one of the 96 fans crushed to death |
| As Joan Hope made sandwiches for her 18-year-old son to take to the football on 15 April, 1989, it seemed just another ordinary day. | |
| Looking out of the window of her home in Holywell, Flintshire, she admired the sunny spring weather. | |
| "I thought how beautiful the world is. Springtime - I love springtime, a new beginning," she said. | "I thought how beautiful the world is. Springtime - I love springtime, a new beginning," she said. |
| "But it turned out to be the darkest day imaginable by the end of that day. There's no darker day than that." | "But it turned out to be the darkest day imaginable by the end of that day. There's no darker day than that." |
| Mrs Hope's teenage son, John McBrien, went to the the FA Cup semi-final between his club Liverpool FC and Nottingham Forest at Sheffield Wednesday's stadium. | |
| He never returned home. | |
| He was one of the 96 Liverpool fans who were crushed to death on the steel-fenced terraces in a tragedy that changed British football. | |
| Now, on the 20th anniversary, bereaved families are receiving the freedom of Liverpool at the club's Anfield ground. | |
| When the innocent die through no fault of their own you can't forget it can you? Joan Hope, mother of John McBrien | |
| Mrs Hope will be there, as she has been at every anniversary event held for the victims. | Mrs Hope will be there, as she has been at every anniversary event held for the victims. |
| But, despite two decades passing since her "precious" son's death, the memory of what happened is still painful for her. | But, despite two decades passing since her "precious" son's death, the memory of what happened is still painful for her. |
| Recalling that fateful day after John had left for the match, she said: "I didn't take too much notice of the football to tell you the truth, so it was just an ordinary day. | Recalling that fateful day after John had left for the match, she said: "I didn't take too much notice of the football to tell you the truth, so it was just an ordinary day. |
| "We went shopping to Chester and strangely enough, it's a dark place that, even the car park in Tesco, and Roy [her husband] said there's something wrong. There's something happening at the football match. And then I still didn't take too much notice, I thought it won't be too bad whatever's happening. | "We went shopping to Chester and strangely enough, it's a dark place that, even the car park in Tesco, and Roy [her husband] said there's something wrong. There's something happening at the football match. And then I still didn't take too much notice, I thought it won't be too bad whatever's happening. |
| "But of course we had the radio on and it didn't look good. It didn't look good at all. It just became darker and darker, the day. We were hearing so many people had died at this football match. It was unbelievable. And numbers were going higher and higher. | "But of course we had the radio on and it didn't look good. It didn't look good at all. It just became darker and darker, the day. We were hearing so many people had died at this football match. It was unbelievable. And numbers were going higher and higher. |
| "It was very distressing. You don't know what to do, you're helpless." | "It was very distressing. You don't know what to do, you're helpless." |
| Fight for justice | Fight for justice |
| John had gone to the match on a coach with a Liverpool supporters' group and his parents believed he would return with them. | John had gone to the match on a coach with a Liverpool supporters' group and his parents believed he would return with them. |
| But when he didn't, they drove to Sheffield to look for him. | But when he didn't, they drove to Sheffield to look for him. |
| Mrs Hope said she fainted as she and her husband searched, clinging to the hope he was in a hospital. | Mrs Hope said she fainted as she and her husband searched, clinging to the hope he was in a hospital. |
| That hope ended when they were asked to identify John as one of the victims. | That hope ended when they were asked to identify John as one of the victims. |
| "It was dreadful. You had to identify him on this pictures and what they had gone through... it was hard to identify them," she said. | "It was dreadful. You had to identify him on this pictures and what they had gone through... it was hard to identify them," she said. |
| The inquiry into the disaster said there was a failure of police crowd control | The inquiry into the disaster said there was a failure of police crowd control |
| "I saw him as a really good looking young man, really fit, so happy. To go and identify him on a photo like that, it's not good, it's not nice at all. It was horrific from start to finish." | "I saw him as a really good looking young man, really fit, so happy. To go and identify him on a photo like that, it's not good, it's not nice at all. It was horrific from start to finish." |
| Twenty years on, she said she has learnt to forget her anger - but the pain and loss will never go away. | Twenty years on, she said she has learnt to forget her anger - but the pain and loss will never go away. |
| "It's just as real to me today as it was then. I do feel that pain so strongly," she said. | "It's just as real to me today as it was then. I do feel that pain so strongly," she said. |
| "But you see sometimes how life has to go on. For 10 years I fought, I felt angry. I wanted to prove you could get justice. But I realise now you can't in certain circumstances and so I accept it. | "But you see sometimes how life has to go on. For 10 years I fought, I felt angry. I wanted to prove you could get justice. But I realise now you can't in certain circumstances and so I accept it. |
| 'Human error' | |
| "It's no use fighting any longer. I fought as much as I could because I loved John so much but I did my best for him." | "It's no use fighting any longer. I fought as much as I could because I loved John so much but I did my best for him." |
| The inquiry into the disaster led by Lord Chief Justice Taylor established that main cause was a failure of police crowd control. | The inquiry into the disaster led by Lord Chief Justice Taylor established that main cause was a failure of police crowd control. |
| Mrs Hope said it was the knowledge that a "catalogue of errors" had caused the death of "innocent people" that made the tragedy so hard to forget. | Mrs Hope said it was the knowledge that a "catalogue of errors" had caused the death of "innocent people" that made the tragedy so hard to forget. |
| "I have attended every anniversary, it will be the 20th this time," she added. | "I have attended every anniversary, it will be the 20th this time," she added. |
| "People feel these things still and they know that something is wrong. You don't go on like this otherwise... When the innocent die through no fault of their own you can't forget it can you? | "People feel these things still and they know that something is wrong. You don't go on like this otherwise... When the innocent die through no fault of their own you can't forget it can you? |
| "You can forgive because of human error but you cannot forget. No, not until the day you die would you forget." | "You can forgive because of human error but you cannot forget. No, not until the day you die would you forget." |