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| All you don't want for Christmas | All you don't want for Christmas |
| (about 5 hours later) | |
| By Stephen Robb BBC News A quick search on auction site eBay for the words "Christmas" and "unwanted" already brings up hundreds of results. | |
| And with many eccentric relatives and limpet-like family friends only just departing this weekend, many more people will soon be online to rid themselves of undesirable Christmas tat. | And with many eccentric relatives and limpet-like family friends only just departing this weekend, many more people will soon be online to rid themselves of undesirable Christmas tat. |
| "Grab a sick bag," warns the seller of what appears to be a small china ornament of two bright green pea-pod creatures. | "Grab a sick bag," warns the seller of what appears to be a small china ornament of two bright green pea-pod creatures. |
| "What uses do these have?" continues an unconventional sales pitch that has in four days generated one bid at the starting price of 99p. | "What uses do these have?" continues an unconventional sales pitch that has in four days generated one bid at the starting price of 99p. |
| Whether it is purely a reaction to their unwanted gift, or the result of "quality time" with family, Christmas spirit seems to have deserted the seller of a golf club brush set. | Whether it is purely a reaction to their unwanted gift, or the result of "quality time" with family, Christmas spirit seems to have deserted the seller of a golf club brush set. |
| "Santa must have left this in error, I'll give him error when I get my hands on him," they write. | "Santa must have left this in error, I'll give him error when I get my hands on him," they write. |
| "Do people who play golf scrub their things then? The mind boggles." Not least at how such a specific gift was so wrongly directed. | "Do people who play golf scrub their things then? The mind boggles." Not least at how such a specific gift was so wrongly directed. |
| Bidding up to £1.04 seems unlikely to offer a calming effect. | Bidding up to £1.04 seems unlikely to offer a calming effect. |
| I'm a girl with absolutely no interest in cars whatsoever, can identify a Mini at a push, and yet someone gave me this | I'm a girl with absolutely no interest in cars whatsoever, can identify a Mini at a push, and yet someone gave me this |
| "Well I'm not sure what happened here," writes another seller, capturing the familiar bemusement at the most misjudged Christmas gifts. | "Well I'm not sure what happened here," writes another seller, capturing the familiar bemusement at the most misjudged Christmas gifts. |
| "I'm a girl with absolutely no interest in cars whatsoever, can identify a Mini at a push, and yet someone gave me this as a Chrimbo pressie," she says. | "I'm a girl with absolutely no interest in cars whatsoever, can identify a Mini at a push, and yet someone gave me this as a Chrimbo pressie," she says. |
| The book by Jeremy Clarkson is being sold to free up shelf space "for some Serious Chick Lit", she says. | The book by Jeremy Clarkson is being sold to free up shelf space "for some Serious Chick Lit", she says. |
| But Clarkson's Don't Stop Me Now has so far failed to get any bidders started, even priced at under £1. | But Clarkson's Don't Stop Me Now has so far failed to get any bidders started, even priced at under £1. |
| Surprise | Surprise |
| Meanwhile, a faithful recreation of the Christmas Day present-receiving experience can be secured on eBay with an unopened "secret Santa" gift. | Meanwhile, a faithful recreation of the Christmas Day present-receiving experience can be secured on eBay with an unopened "secret Santa" gift. |
| "Remember I don't know what's in here as I don't want to open it to check," the seller writes. | "Remember I don't know what's in here as I don't want to open it to check," the seller writes. |
| Few clues are offered by the additional statement: "The gift measures about 20cm, tried shaking it, there's not a lot of movement." | Few clues are offered by the additional statement: "The gift measures about 20cm, tried shaking it, there's not a lot of movement." |
| There are numerous offerings of unwanted cooked sprouts on eBayWhether it delivers a delightful surprise or another unwanted Christmas present, at least buying on eBay requires no forced smile and fake gratitude. | There are numerous offerings of unwanted cooked sprouts on eBayWhether it delivers a delightful surprise or another unwanted Christmas present, at least buying on eBay requires no forced smile and fake gratitude. |
| Elsewhere, a seller is looking to cash in on the unpopularity among his loved ones of certain items from the traditional sweets tin. | Elsewhere, a seller is looking to cash in on the unpopularity among his loved ones of certain items from the traditional sweets tin. |
| Bidding for the "yummy gold-wrapped toffees" has reached a dizzying 55p, from a starting price of a penny. | Bidding for the "yummy gold-wrapped toffees" has reached a dizzying 55p, from a starting price of a penny. |
| But there is a warning of an additional £100 payable in dentistry fees after the sweets "yank out your fillings". | But there is a warning of an additional £100 payable in dentistry fees after the sweets "yank out your fillings". |
| Pie buy | Pie buy |
| A lively debate has sprung up around the auction of a half-eaten mince pie, with queries about accompanying sauces, its metal container, and a possible swap for other vegetables. | A lively debate has sprung up around the auction of a half-eaten mince pie, with queries about accompanying sauces, its metal container, and a possible swap for other vegetables. |
| Bidding has reached 6p for the pie portion, deliverable by the usual methods or "food fight", the seller advises. | Bidding has reached 6p for the pie portion, deliverable by the usual methods or "food fight", the seller advises. |
| There also appears to be a trend developing for eBay's use as a means of disposal for that most divisive of seasonal foods, Brussels sprouts. | There also appears to be a trend developing for eBay's use as a means of disposal for that most divisive of seasonal foods, Brussels sprouts. |
| One seller is hoping to sweeten the deal on four sprouts by throwing in some peas - precisely 83, in fact - a little gravy, and even the orange plate on which they were photographed. | One seller is hoping to sweeten the deal on four sprouts by throwing in some peas - precisely 83, in fact - a little gravy, and even the orange plate on which they were photographed. |
| The lack of bids for this item suggests that in the area of auctioned sprouts, less may be more. | The lack of bids for this item suggests that in the area of auctioned sprouts, less may be more. |
| Bidding has reached more than £15 for a lot comprising just two unwanted sprouts. | Bidding has reached more than £15 for a lot comprising just two unwanted sprouts. |
| "Luckily for them, they stayed together with only each other as company, and despite them being quite upset, they would love a new home," the seller writes. | "Luckily for them, they stayed together with only each other as company, and despite them being quite upset, they would love a new home," the seller writes. |
| Excitement is building as the auction nears its end on 1 January. | Excitement is building as the auction nears its end on 1 January. |