Is Date Night a Scam?

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/13/parenting/relationships-fertility-newsletter.html

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You’ve probably heard the conventional advice for couples who want to stay connected after kids: “Plan a date night!” While we have nothing against date nights, our reporter, Christina Caron, asked experts for some different ways to maintain intimacy, for the long-term. We also want to hear from you. If you’re married or in a relationship, what do you do to stay close to your partner, despite the stresses of parenthood? Drop us a line, and we may feature your story in an upcoming piece.

Also new to the site this week, we have our complete guide to fertility and getting pregnant; and B.A. and Nikki Williams discuss the judgment and self-doubt they’ve faced as a queer couple trying to conceive. Jancee Dunn, the author of “How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids,” admits she didn’t bond with her baby right away and found out she’s not alone. And, finally, after California’s largest power utility shut down this week, parents got creative to keep breast milk from spoiling. Scroll down for these stories and a Tiny Victory from the mom of a stubborn 3-year-old (a.k.a., a 3-year-old).

— Jessica Grose

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Don’t wait for the most convenient time to rebuild intimacy. You’ll be waiting a long time.

7 ways to stay close

A primer on how to conceive, what treatments are available and risk factors for infertility.

What to do

My husband fell swooningly in love. For me, it took time and patience to connect with my infant.

Sound familiar?

Nikki and B.A. have been trying to conceive using assisted fertility, but they’ve run into judgment and self-doubt along the way.

Read the couple’s conversation

After California’s largest power company shut down, parents needed ways to keep breast milk from spoiling.

How they did it

Parenting can be a grind. Let’s celebrate the tiny victories.

As summer drew to a close, we had a daily battle with our 3-year-old son to wear pants instead of shorts. We finally succeeded by convincing him to wear his shorts on top of his pants. This is now what he wears to day care every single day. — Kathryn Laflamme, Ottawa, Canada

If you want a chance to get your Tiny Victory published, find us on Instagram @NYTparenting and use the hashtag #tinyvictories; email us; or enter your Tiny Victory at the bottom of this page. Include your full name and location. Tiny Victories may be edited for clarity and style. Your name, location and comments may be published, but your contact information will not. By submitting to us, you agree that you have read, understand and accept the Reader Submission Terms in relation to all of the content and other information you send to us.