Thinking About Death

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/28/opinion/letters/death-dying.html

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To the Editor:

In “At 40, Looking Death in the Eye” (Sunday Review, March 24), Michael David Lukas captured the transcendence of thought that helped me start to process the death of my son at 44. After 25 “bonus years” in remission for Hodgkin’s, my son succumbed to radiation-induced lung cancer just as he was hitting the prime of his life.

I treasure the time that we did have and all that we packed into those bonus years. It’s still never easy, but I focus more on things that we did and less on mourning over what wasn’t and what might have been.

Mr. Lukas’s article was like a strong hug from someone who genuinely understands. Thinking that “not everything happens for a reason” was a solid step in my continuing process of moving forward.

Judy BortmanBasking Ridge, N.J.

To the Editor:

Michael David Lukas’s view that “it’s oddly comforting … to look mortality in the eye” could hardly be more in tune with today’s conventional wisdom. It’s time to air an alternative view.

At 71, I find nothing comforting about looking the unmitigated evil of mortality in the eye.

I’ll maintain to my last breath

Loving life means fearing death.

Felicia Nimue AckermanProvidence, R.I.