Papers joke of black hole threat

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Many papers joke about the claim by doomsayers that the Large Hadron Collider could create a black hole when it is switched on.

The Independent says the legal bid to stop the Big Bang has rightly been rejected but still bids its readers "a fond farewell".

A Guardian reader says what an honour it is to have a letter printed in the "final edition" of the paper.

The Sun warns that its report may not be available after 0830.

Park wardens

A number of papers report that a Shropshire council has ordered park wardens to stop and question adults if they are not accompanied by a child.

The Daily Mail says the policy, introduced by Telford and Wrekin Council, aims to safeguard children.

The Mirror says it emerged when two environmental campaigners were thrown out of a park when dressed as penguins.

The Telegraph reports the council has said people are stopped only if they behave in a suspicious manner.

Fuel help

Several papers have further details of the government's measures to help households pay their fuel bills.

The Sun says there will be free loft lagging and double glazing, slashing up to £250 off heating costs.

It says gas and electric firms and DIY companies have been signed up to do the work for the 10 million families.

The Guardian, which leads on the story, adds the Prime Minister is also expected to make improvements to the cold weather payment scheme.

Poet's complaints

The Poet Laureate, Andrew Motion, has been complaining about his job.

The Daily Mail says he told an arts festival: "The job has been incredibly difficult and entirely thankless."

He says he does not get any feedback from the Queen. The Telegraph quotes him as saying that he wrote a poem for her diamond wedding anniversary.

He read it at Westminster Abbey. "Afterwards", he says, "the Queen stopped me and said thank you. But I have no idea if she really liked it".