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| 'It was making me ill': experiences of sexual harassment at work | 'It was making me ill': experiences of sexual harassment at work |
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| Four women describe how it feels to face harassment in jobs from waitressing to painting and decorating | |
| Mon 15 Jan 2018 00.01 GMT | |
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| Sarah, 27, electrician | Sarah, 27, electrician |
| I started as an electrical apprentice in 2012, and for the first six months I loved it. I became friends with one of the bosses and he started sending me suggestive text messages. One said something like: “Why don’t you come over to my house and sit on my … and let me show you what a real man can do.” That was the type of thing I was getting quite regularly. I said: “Please can you stop doing it. You’re married and it’s not appropriate.” | I started as an electrical apprentice in 2012, and for the first six months I loved it. I became friends with one of the bosses and he started sending me suggestive text messages. One said something like: “Why don’t you come over to my house and sit on my … and let me show you what a real man can do.” That was the type of thing I was getting quite regularly. I said: “Please can you stop doing it. You’re married and it’s not appropriate.” |
| I was friends with someone related to the big boss, and I mentioned it to him. I did stop getting the text messages, but the way I was treated dramatically changed. It was just a constant battle then for the next three years. When I raised a formal complaint they basically pointed the finger at me, saying I hadn’t said anything at the time. They said I had provoked the situation, that it was me that had caused it. | I was friends with someone related to the big boss, and I mentioned it to him. I did stop getting the text messages, but the way I was treated dramatically changed. It was just a constant battle then for the next three years. When I raised a formal complaint they basically pointed the finger at me, saying I hadn’t said anything at the time. They said I had provoked the situation, that it was me that had caused it. |
| But I was used to being treated with disrespect. It was only when my partner said it was wrong that I decided to speak out. In the end he was given a written warning, and I ended up leaving the company. It was making me ill. I felt I had to leave because they were going to make my life unbearable. | But I was used to being treated with disrespect. It was only when my partner said it was wrong that I decided to speak out. In the end he was given a written warning, and I ended up leaving the company. It was making me ill. I felt I had to leave because they were going to make my life unbearable. |
| Anna, 24, waitress | Anna, 24, waitress |
| We were really busy [one] night so I was helping the waiting staff take drinks to a table. We had a big office party in, mostly men, and every time I walked past them they made comments about my appearance and the way my chest looks in my shirt. It made me really uncomfortable. | We were really busy [one] night so I was helping the waiting staff take drinks to a table. We had a big office party in, mostly men, and every time I walked past them they made comments about my appearance and the way my chest looks in my shirt. It made me really uncomfortable. |
| Then after their last drink I was walking past them again and one of them grabbed me by the hips and pretended he was doing me up the arse while the rest of them stood around laughing. One of the women in the group told him to stop it and get off me, and then the men she was with started laughing at her, and one of them then grabbed her and started doing the same to her. It was awful. | Then after their last drink I was walking past them again and one of them grabbed me by the hips and pretended he was doing me up the arse while the rest of them stood around laughing. One of the women in the group told him to stop it and get off me, and then the men she was with started laughing at her, and one of them then grabbed her and started doing the same to her. It was awful. |
| Then my manager told them they had to pay and leave, and they left a massive tip. One of the women came up to me to apologise and gave me £50. It felt like they were buying me off. | Then my manager told them they had to pay and leave, and they left a massive tip. One of the women came up to me to apologise and gave me £50. It felt like they were buying me off. |
| [Sexual harassment] happens all the time. It’s like men think that because they are giving you money to pour them a drink or whatever that also means they are entitled to your body. Or they expect you to flirt with them and then get offended if you don’t, like it’s a bad thing that you’re just trying to be professional. Or they will wait for you to finish your shift and try to follow you. Or they make comments about our uniforms (which aren’t revealing, or tight, or whatever), like how your chest looks or whether or not the skirt is too short. | [Sexual harassment] happens all the time. It’s like men think that because they are giving you money to pour them a drink or whatever that also means they are entitled to your body. Or they expect you to flirt with them and then get offended if you don’t, like it’s a bad thing that you’re just trying to be professional. Or they will wait for you to finish your shift and try to follow you. Or they make comments about our uniforms (which aren’t revealing, or tight, or whatever), like how your chest looks or whether or not the skirt is too short. |
| Tracey, 43, painter and decorator | Tracey, 43, painter and decorator |
| My harassment started as soon as I started working with men. I was working for a company and there was this one guy in particular who every time we met would ask me what colour underwear I was wearing, if I’d seen such and such disgusting film. But it was constant. If I was painting floorboards it was always “while you’re down there love”, or while I was tiling a bathroom someone came in and just urinated while I was in the room, or I’d be slapped on the arse with a piece of wood or paperwork. | My harassment started as soon as I started working with men. I was working for a company and there was this one guy in particular who every time we met would ask me what colour underwear I was wearing, if I’d seen such and such disgusting film. But it was constant. If I was painting floorboards it was always “while you’re down there love”, or while I was tiling a bathroom someone came in and just urinated while I was in the room, or I’d be slapped on the arse with a piece of wood or paperwork. |
| I did make a formal complaint about a guy who had stroked my hand while I was driving and I nearly crashed, but they basically said they didn’t believe me. When I decided to leave one bloke gave me a hug and groped my tit. I’m self-employed now and it’s a bit of a struggle, but I’m happy I just don’t get any of that hassle any more. | I did make a formal complaint about a guy who had stroked my hand while I was driving and I nearly crashed, but they basically said they didn’t believe me. When I decided to leave one bloke gave me a hug and groped my tit. I’m self-employed now and it’s a bit of a struggle, but I’m happy I just don’t get any of that hassle any more. |
| Laura, 24, former market stall worker | Laura, 24, former market stall worker |
| My first experience of sexual harassment was in my first job working on a food stall on a local market while I was studying for my A-levels. The manager of the food stall would only hire young women. The space was tight, so we had to often squeeze past each other, but there was actually more space than he made out as he would often brush against me unnecessarily. | My first experience of sexual harassment was in my first job working on a food stall on a local market while I was studying for my A-levels. The manager of the food stall would only hire young women. The space was tight, so we had to often squeeze past each other, but there was actually more space than he made out as he would often brush against me unnecessarily. |
| At the end of the day I had to help pack up the stall, which meant walking past another stall where a group of about five men worked. They would leer, wolf-whistle and generally catcall as I struggled with heavy wooden planks and rubbish. They would ask: “Where did you get her from? Can we get one?” etc. | At the end of the day I had to help pack up the stall, which meant walking past another stall where a group of about five men worked. They would leer, wolf-whistle and generally catcall as I struggled with heavy wooden planks and rubbish. They would ask: “Where did you get her from? Can we get one?” etc. |
| My second experience was while I was volunteering supporting victims and survivors of rape and sexual assault. Occasionally, men would phone, would start to recount their “abuse”, but it would quickly become clear that they were masturbating whilst I was talking to them. They would go into quite a lot of detail and it was clear that they were actually telling me what they wanted to do to me. | My second experience was while I was volunteering supporting victims and survivors of rape and sexual assault. Occasionally, men would phone, would start to recount their “abuse”, but it would quickly become clear that they were masturbating whilst I was talking to them. They would go into quite a lot of detail and it was clear that they were actually telling me what they wanted to do to me. |
| I think that a lot of people are either in denial that sexual harassment is so prolific, or just think it is inevitable. It also feels like it’s a risk to report it, depending on how your organisation or manager feel about it. Sometimes, it’s easier to just get on with it, especially if you depend on your job to survive. | I think that a lot of people are either in denial that sexual harassment is so prolific, or just think it is inevitable. It also feels like it’s a risk to report it, depending on how your organisation or manager feel about it. Sometimes, it’s easier to just get on with it, especially if you depend on your job to survive. |
| • Names have been changed. | • Names have been changed. |
| Sexual harassment | |
| Women | |
| Work & careers | |
| features | |
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