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Garçon! Some outdated, embarrassing phrases, por favor Garçon! Some outdated, embarrassing phrases, por favor
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Tue 29 Aug 2017 18.43 BST
Last modified on Sat 25 Nov 2017 02.15 GMT
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Pity the British tabloid headline-writer on his annual holiday. He falls off his easyJet in Nice, hails a waiter with a cheery “garçon!”, exclaims “sacre bleu!” when the food comes, a less enthused “zut alors!” when the bill arrives, “ooh la la!” when he spots a girl changing on the promenade, asks her “voulez-vous coucher avec moi”, then issues a philosophical “comme ci comme ça” when she scuttles off, and never, in all of that, says anything meaningful to French ears.Pity the British tabloid headline-writer on his annual holiday. He falls off his easyJet in Nice, hails a waiter with a cheery “garçon!”, exclaims “sacre bleu!” when the food comes, a less enthused “zut alors!” when the bill arrives, “ooh la la!” when he spots a girl changing on the promenade, asks her “voulez-vous coucher avec moi”, then issues a philosophical “comme ci comme ça” when she scuttles off, and never, in all of that, says anything meaningful to French ears.
It will be too late for many this summer, but language-learning app Babbel has just issued a list of terms to be avoided in foreign parts, for fear of uttering embarrassingly dated or off-key language. They include all of the above. Plus their Italian equivalents, such as “Mamma mia”, and the Spanish, “Hasta la vista”.It will be too late for many this summer, but language-learning app Babbel has just issued a list of terms to be avoided in foreign parts, for fear of uttering embarrassingly dated or off-key language. They include all of the above. Plus their Italian equivalents, such as “Mamma mia”, and the Spanish, “Hasta la vista”.
Garçon literally means “boy”, and should only really be used if you are prepared to click your fingers at your waiter for the full effect. “Ooh la la” doesn’t come with the coquettish connotations we have given it. In France, it is an exclamation of deflation, best translated as: “Oh crap.”Garçon literally means “boy”, and should only really be used if you are prepared to click your fingers at your waiter for the full effect. “Ooh la la” doesn’t come with the coquettish connotations we have given it. In France, it is an exclamation of deflation, best translated as: “Oh crap.”
It gets worse. “Sacre bleu” is a curse that dates back to the era when it was considered blasphemous to, take God’s name in vain by saying “sacre Dieu”, so you would insert a word that rhymed instead. It owes its spell over the British imagination purely to Agatha Christie, who often inserted the phrase into the little grey cells of Hercule Poirot. “Zut alors” is also creaking long past retirement – nowadays only glimpsed in Asterix comics, and that is set 2,000 years ago.It gets worse. “Sacre bleu” is a curse that dates back to the era when it was considered blasphemous to, take God’s name in vain by saying “sacre Dieu”, so you would insert a word that rhymed instead. It owes its spell over the British imagination purely to Agatha Christie, who often inserted the phrase into the little grey cells of Hercule Poirot. “Zut alors” is also creaking long past retirement – nowadays only glimpsed in Asterix comics, and that is set 2,000 years ago.
Do Italians really run around shouting “mamma mia!” as they leap out of Fiat 500s parked at non-Euclidian angles? Apparently not much any more – it is a phrase dying out with the older generation. Even what we would consider unshakeable solid ground – “bon appétit” – is more problematic than you might expect, and besides, it is normally shortened to “bon app” by French youth.Do Italians really run around shouting “mamma mia!” as they leap out of Fiat 500s parked at non-Euclidian angles? Apparently not much any more – it is a phrase dying out with the older generation. Even what we would consider unshakeable solid ground – “bon appétit” – is more problematic than you might expect, and besides, it is normally shortened to “bon app” by French youth.
Somewhere in our national memory, we have carved out a separate language called Pop Culture Foreignish, encompassing everything from Del Boy saying “adegos” for a Spanish goodbye to “aprés-ski”. You would have thought someone might have pointed out our errors by now, yet the desire to dribble this stuff over our sentences is remarkably persistent. Despite being like saying “heavens-to-Betsy”, even now “sacre bleu” can still be found in British newspapers describing hot baguettes, burgers, or anti-petanque measures. “Zut alors” will do in case you need to reference anything from an “8,000-year-old Heston Blumenthal-style feast” to Jeremy Paxman’s views on the nation’s bond market.Somewhere in our national memory, we have carved out a separate language called Pop Culture Foreignish, encompassing everything from Del Boy saying “adegos” for a Spanish goodbye to “aprés-ski”. You would have thought someone might have pointed out our errors by now, yet the desire to dribble this stuff over our sentences is remarkably persistent. Despite being like saying “heavens-to-Betsy”, even now “sacre bleu” can still be found in British newspapers describing hot baguettes, burgers, or anti-petanque measures. “Zut alors” will do in case you need to reference anything from an “8,000-year-old Heston Blumenthal-style feast” to Jeremy Paxman’s views on the nation’s bond market.
Pop culture can still be a great place to learn a new language, but by its basic pop-ness, it often scoops up bits that die out quickly, too. “Ça plane pour moi” – that works for me – still works for francophones nearly 40 years after Plastic Bertrand. Many of us have Talking Heads to thank for being able to pick the question “Qu’est que c’est?” out of any passing blur of conversation.Pop culture can still be a great place to learn a new language, but by its basic pop-ness, it often scoops up bits that die out quickly, too. “Ça plane pour moi” – that works for me – still works for francophones nearly 40 years after Plastic Bertrand. Many of us have Talking Heads to thank for being able to pick the question “Qu’est que c’est?” out of any passing blur of conversation.
Most will be glad to know that the kinds of phrases gleaned from reading Warlord! annuals: “Achtung!” (Danger!!) “Schnell!” (Fast!!!) are very much still good to go should you ever find yourself manning a machine-gun nest in the Ardennes.Most will be glad to know that the kinds of phrases gleaned from reading Warlord! annuals: “Achtung!” (Danger!!) “Schnell!” (Fast!!!) are very much still good to go should you ever find yourself manning a machine-gun nest in the Ardennes.
But pop culture can deceive, too. The phrase “voulez-vous coucher avec moi”, still intoned by giggly schoolboys on exchanges every year, not only sounds weird and backwards to French ears, it is also more commonly associated with prostitution. “Giuchie-giuchie-ya-ya-dada” is anyone’s guess.But pop culture can deceive, too. The phrase “voulez-vous coucher avec moi”, still intoned by giggly schoolboys on exchanges every year, not only sounds weird and backwards to French ears, it is also more commonly associated with prostitution. “Giuchie-giuchie-ya-ya-dada” is anyone’s guess.
The French don’t seem to make as many mistakes in reverse. Perhaps because the dreaded Anglo-Saxon tide saturates them so much they can’t drift apart from it. The phrase “So British” is itself a cliche they like to stick on adverts for chic English stuff. The day after Brexit, Libération’s cover was Boris Johnson on the zipwire, with the perfectly grammatical: “Good Luck”. Although perhaps in that very specific context “Pip, pip, cheerio” wouldn’t have been out of place, either.The French don’t seem to make as many mistakes in reverse. Perhaps because the dreaded Anglo-Saxon tide saturates them so much they can’t drift apart from it. The phrase “So British” is itself a cliche they like to stick on adverts for chic English stuff. The day after Brexit, Libération’s cover was Boris Johnson on the zipwire, with the perfectly grammatical: “Good Luck”. Although perhaps in that very specific context “Pip, pip, cheerio” wouldn’t have been out of place, either.
Rather than regurgitating stock phrases, it is more fun when a language takes in terms it likes the look of and twists them through the mangle of its own sensibilities.Rather than regurgitating stock phrases, it is more fun when a language takes in terms it likes the look of and twists them through the mangle of its own sensibilities.
What better tribute to the Entente than the French term for a makeover: “un relooking”, or their bastardised word for jogging: “footing”. Germans do the same, with possibly more cheery barbarism: “ein handy” for mobile phone, “beamer” for projector, “showmaster” for TV presenter, and the ingenious “pullunder” for waistcoat.What better tribute to the Entente than the French term for a makeover: “un relooking”, or their bastardised word for jogging: “footing”. Germans do the same, with possibly more cheery barbarism: “ein handy” for mobile phone, “beamer” for projector, “showmaster” for TV presenter, and the ingenious “pullunder” for waistcoat.
They have, as the French would say, “a certain I do not know what”.They have, as the French would say, “a certain I do not know what”.
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