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| The dos and don'ts of being a first lady: from Jackie Kennedy to Melania Trump | The dos and don'ts of being a first lady: from Jackie Kennedy to Melania Trump |
| (about 1 month later) | |
| Ever since her husband was elected president of the United States, there’s been speculation about how much Melania Trump really wants to 1) be The Donald’s wife; 2) take on the duties of first lady. Not least because it has taken the former model more than a month to move into the White House, which she and her son Barron finally did this week. Barron marked the occasion by wearing a T-Shirt reading “The Expert”, already now sold out. | Ever since her husband was elected president of the United States, there’s been speculation about how much Melania Trump really wants to 1) be The Donald’s wife; 2) take on the duties of first lady. Not least because it has taken the former model more than a month to move into the White House, which she and her son Barron finally did this week. Barron marked the occasion by wearing a T-Shirt reading “The Expert”, already now sold out. |
| I’m no expert but, I’d wager that despite this move, recent events suggest the answer to question one might still be: very little. During the Trumps’ first official international trip, to the Middle East and Europe, much was made of Melania twice batting away Trump’s outstretched hand (also very little). But while Melania appeared unwilling to hold her husband’s hand, it looked like she was finally getting a handle on the whole first lady thing. She has spent much of Trump’s presidency shunning the spotlight, leading many to wonder whether Ivanka might be assuming the role of a surrogate first lady. On this first foreign foray, however, Melania seemed to come out of her shell. She bantered with the Pope and visited sick children; Anita McBride, who was chief of staff to first lady Laura Bush, told CNN that when she saw Melania step off Air Force Once with Trump, she looked “fully prepared for her role”. | I’m no expert but, I’d wager that despite this move, recent events suggest the answer to question one might still be: very little. During the Trumps’ first official international trip, to the Middle East and Europe, much was made of Melania twice batting away Trump’s outstretched hand (also very little). But while Melania appeared unwilling to hold her husband’s hand, it looked like she was finally getting a handle on the whole first lady thing. She has spent much of Trump’s presidency shunning the spotlight, leading many to wonder whether Ivanka might be assuming the role of a surrogate first lady. On this first foreign foray, however, Melania seemed to come out of her shell. She bantered with the Pope and visited sick children; Anita McBride, who was chief of staff to first lady Laura Bush, told CNN that when she saw Melania step off Air Force Once with Trump, she looked “fully prepared for her role”. |
| But what exactly is a first lady? According to the Bible, it’s someone who is made out of a rib and really likes apples; in American politics, however, it has a different definition. That said, the definition is pretty loose says US history expert Christopher Andersen. While there’s no rulebook, there are numerous unwritten rules. First ladies are, for example, expected to perform ceremonial tasks such as hosting state dinners and planning annual events like the Easter egg roll and the Christmas party. “Every first lady is also expected to pick at least one or two causes to support,” says Andersen. In the cases of Laura and Barbara Bush, it was literacy; Nancy Reagan took on drug addiction; Michelle Obama took on healthy eating. At one point Melania said she was going to fight cyberbullying but, since her husband, you know, gets on Twitter at 3am to bully people this caused something of a backlash. | But what exactly is a first lady? According to the Bible, it’s someone who is made out of a rib and really likes apples; in American politics, however, it has a different definition. That said, the definition is pretty loose says US history expert Christopher Andersen. While there’s no rulebook, there are numerous unwritten rules. First ladies are, for example, expected to perform ceremonial tasks such as hosting state dinners and planning annual events like the Easter egg roll and the Christmas party. “Every first lady is also expected to pick at least one or two causes to support,” says Andersen. In the cases of Laura and Barbara Bush, it was literacy; Nancy Reagan took on drug addiction; Michelle Obama took on healthy eating. At one point Melania said she was going to fight cyberbullying but, since her husband, you know, gets on Twitter at 3am to bully people this caused something of a backlash. |
| As well as first lady need-to-dos, there are a lot of probably-don’ts. For example, you shouldn’t hire an astrologer to help plan your husband’s schedule. Nancy Reagan faced a bout of bad publicity and ridicule after it transpired she’d done just this in the 1980s. First ladies also do well to remember that their place is in the east wing of the White House, not the west wing. While they are expected to do meaningful work, they’re also expected to know their limits. In 1996, Hillary Clinton received the lowest approval rating of any first lady in modern history, largely stemming from her attempts to take on policy issues such as healthcare. As Andersen explains, “Hillary Clinton wasn’t interested in baking cookies, she really wanted to be a co-president. This got her in trouble so she had to step down a bit.” And Hillary got her highest approval ratings from the American public when she was really down. After the Monica Lewinsky scandal she became a more sympathetic figure, getting her all-time high rating of 67% in December 1998, shortly after her husband was impeached. | As well as first lady need-to-dos, there are a lot of probably-don’ts. For example, you shouldn’t hire an astrologer to help plan your husband’s schedule. Nancy Reagan faced a bout of bad publicity and ridicule after it transpired she’d done just this in the 1980s. First ladies also do well to remember that their place is in the east wing of the White House, not the west wing. While they are expected to do meaningful work, they’re also expected to know their limits. In 1996, Hillary Clinton received the lowest approval rating of any first lady in modern history, largely stemming from her attempts to take on policy issues such as healthcare. As Andersen explains, “Hillary Clinton wasn’t interested in baking cookies, she really wanted to be a co-president. This got her in trouble so she had to step down a bit.” And Hillary got her highest approval ratings from the American public when she was really down. After the Monica Lewinsky scandal she became a more sympathetic figure, getting her all-time high rating of 67% in December 1998, shortly after her husband was impeached. |
| First ladies aren’t expected to navigate their nebulous role alone; they normally have a staff of 15-30 people. Often this includes loyal longtime friends. Jackie Kennedy appointed her boarding school girlfriend Nancy Tuckerman as her social secretary for example. And while Melania Trump has been slow in appointing a staff, she’s also already put her friends in high places, making close companion Stephanie Winston Wolkoff (a former Vogue staffer nicknamed “General Winston” by Anna Wintour) her acting senior adviser and chief strategist. There’s also, says Andersen, a “first ladies club”; despite differences in politics, first ladies share a close bond and support each other. | First ladies aren’t expected to navigate their nebulous role alone; they normally have a staff of 15-30 people. Often this includes loyal longtime friends. Jackie Kennedy appointed her boarding school girlfriend Nancy Tuckerman as her social secretary for example. And while Melania Trump has been slow in appointing a staff, she’s also already put her friends in high places, making close companion Stephanie Winston Wolkoff (a former Vogue staffer nicknamed “General Winston” by Anna Wintour) her acting senior adviser and chief strategist. There’s also, says Andersen, a “first ladies club”; despite differences in politics, first ladies share a close bond and support each other. |
| It’s an unelected role with no salary, but a first lady can shape history. Eleanor Roosevelt, for example, the longest-serving Flotus so far, was an advocate for numerous human rights causes and has become a feminist icon. Then there’s Betty Ford, wife of the 38th president, Gerald Ford, who had a mastectomy shortly after entering the White House in 1974 and was vocal about breast cancer awareness. This led to record numbers of Americans going for breast cancer screenings which, in turn, caused reported incidents of the disease to rise – often called the “Betty Ford blip”. | It’s an unelected role with no salary, but a first lady can shape history. Eleanor Roosevelt, for example, the longest-serving Flotus so far, was an advocate for numerous human rights causes and has become a feminist icon. Then there’s Betty Ford, wife of the 38th president, Gerald Ford, who had a mastectomy shortly after entering the White House in 1974 and was vocal about breast cancer awareness. This led to record numbers of Americans going for breast cancer screenings which, in turn, caused reported incidents of the disease to rise – often called the “Betty Ford blip”. |
| And you can’t leave out Jackie Kennedy, often considered the “gold standard” of modern first ladies. She undertook an enormous renovation of the White House – “the White House we see today is really Jackie’s White House in many respects,” says Andersen. She also helped hold America together after JFK was assassinated. Andersen recalls that “at the time of the assassination we didn’t know if it was a Russian plot or if nuclear war was around the corner. The country was shaken and there was a great deal of fear”. However, Jackie Kennedy’s bravery “reassured the American public in a big way”. | And you can’t leave out Jackie Kennedy, often considered the “gold standard” of modern first ladies. She undertook an enormous renovation of the White House – “the White House we see today is really Jackie’s White House in many respects,” says Andersen. She also helped hold America together after JFK was assassinated. Andersen recalls that “at the time of the assassination we didn’t know if it was a Russian plot or if nuclear war was around the corner. The country was shaken and there was a great deal of fear”. However, Jackie Kennedy’s bravery “reassured the American public in a big way”. |
| In 2000, Melania told the New York Times that should Donald Trump ever be elected president she’d be a “very traditional” first lady, “like Betty Ford or Jackie Kennedy” - neither of whom were exactly very traditional first ladies. And it has become very clear that there is nothing traditional about the Trump presidency – although America does appear to have gone back in time, worried once again about Russian plots and nuclear wars. If these worries continue should we expect Melania’s bravery to reassure the public in a big way? We’ll have to wait and see, although something tells me she’s not the hand-holding type. | In 2000, Melania told the New York Times that should Donald Trump ever be elected president she’d be a “very traditional” first lady, “like Betty Ford or Jackie Kennedy” - neither of whom were exactly very traditional first ladies. And it has become very clear that there is nothing traditional about the Trump presidency – although America does appear to have gone back in time, worried once again about Russian plots and nuclear wars. If these worries continue should we expect Melania’s bravery to reassure the public in a big way? We’ll have to wait and see, although something tells me she’s not the hand-holding type. |
| Jackie is out on DVD and Blu-ray now | Jackie is out on DVD and Blu-ray now |
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| Melania Trump | Melania Trump |
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