Bland 'historic event' soundtrack spiced up by remainer power ballads
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Version 0 of 1. With the raucous triumphalism of the previous day’s many Rule Britannia contributions still ringing in the ears, the house was in a more chilled-out mood for the second day of the article 50 debate. Time for some Mellow Magic FM. Those old hits that you couldn’t stand at the time but that now you haven’t heard them for a while suddenly begin to feel like old classics. First on the dad-dancing turntable was Ed Miliband. The former Labour leader seems to have grown in stature since he returned to the backbenches. Partly because we no longer have to listen to conference speeches about how he met a bloke called Colin, but mainly because absence makes the heart grow fonder. Hard to believe, but he already belongs to an era when politics did seem to be, if not kinder and gentler, then certainly a lot cuddlier. After stating that he didn’t really believe the referendum reflected the true will of the people, Miliband went on to say that he would be respecting the will of the people by voting with the government. That’s the kind of clear thinking we’d loved and lost. He was on much stronger ground when making the case for Britain to retain its internationalist outlook. “Brexit must not equal Trump,” he said. A few Tories looked a bit uncomfortable about this. It’s only just begun to dawn on them that Donald Trump might not be the best horse to back for a bright new future. Next to get airplay was George Osborne. These days, the former chancellor of the exchequer normally trousers about £75,000 per speech, but today he was prepared to do a bit of pro bono. Call it a charity gig. Brexit may have been a disaster for his political career but it’s done wonders for his bank balance. But George is a decent kinda guy and he recognised that not everyone was going to be as lucky as him. “The economy is not the government’s priority,” he said. “Immigration is. Nor will the EU prioritise the economy in its negotiations with us.” But hey, he was going to vote for the bill anyway because if people wanted to be poorer it was no skin off his nose. If Ed and George were the two soft-rock opening numbers, Alex Salmond was more of a six-minute power ballad. He started loud and got louder. There was no old war he wasn’t prepared to fight again. The referendum had been a bad joke, the article 50 vote was a bad joke, the Scots had been shafted and no one was going to take him alive. The guitar solo was still in full flight when the speaker hit the fade button to allow an Yvette Cooper cover version of Nothing Compares to EU to hit the airwaves. Thereafter the debate became rather more middle of the road. Verbal wallpaper to fill the time before the vote. Heaviest of hearts / gravest of misgivings / Britain never, never will be slaves – delete where applicable. Only those Labour remainers, such as Stella Creasy, Chris Bryant and Mary Creagh, who were planning to ignore their party line, managed to inject any real passion. It’s so much easier to sound sincere when you actually believe in what you’re saying. Jenny Chapman and David Jones were no less prosaic in summing up for both sides. Perhaps they felt they had to live down to much of what had gone before. Jones even managed to lose his place and announce that Britain would be leaving the UK. Now that would be news. It was hard to believe this had all been a preamble to what was a historic moment. Only a year ago, Euroscepticism had been a strictly top-shelf activity, limited to a few hardcore fetishists. Now parliament was about to vote in favour of something most MPs knew to be a bad idea. Not that the vote had ever been in doubt as Jeremy Corbyn had made it a three-line whip for Labour to side with the government. The only real interest was just how many of his MPs would choose to disobey him. The rate of attrition was higher than expected with Corbyn losing two members of his shadow cabinet on the night in addition to the one who had already resigned along with several other frontbenchers. Diane Abbott phoned in ill and stayed at home. More resignations may well follow if Labour’s amendment for a meaningful final vote on the deal does not get passed next week. The nails weren’t just going into Britain’s membership of the EU. They were also being hammered into the Labour coffin. |