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| ‘Buddy Check on 22!’ Veterans Use Social Media to Fight Suicide | ‘Buddy Check on 22!’ Veterans Use Social Media to Fight Suicide |
| (2 days later) | |
| “Buddy check on 22! Where are my warriors?!” That was how E. Michael Davis, a former Army sergeant, greeted his Facebook friends one afternoon last month. | |
| One-by-one, the men and women who had been deployed with him in Iraq and Afghanistan checked in. Many were executing the most mundane of life’s tasks, but they were still alive: Working a long shift. Heading home for a beer. Exercising. Listening to music at the moment, thanks. | One-by-one, the men and women who had been deployed with him in Iraq and Afghanistan checked in. Many were executing the most mundane of life’s tasks, but they were still alive: Working a long shift. Heading home for a beer. Exercising. Listening to music at the moment, thanks. |
| It was March 22. To many civilians, just another Tuesday. But to thousands of veterans and active-duty soldiers, the 22nd of every month is a reminder to make a suicide prevention spot-check on former comrades. A Department of Veterans Affairs study in 2012 said an estimated 22 veterans committed suicide every day in 2010. While other studies calculated a lower tally, closer to one or two per day, the number 22 has taken on potent symbolism on social media, from roll calls to push-up challenges. | |
| “It is an acknowledgment that ‘Hey I am breathing. I am out here,’” Mr. Davis said. “‘I am living life.’” | |
| Robert Bennett, a retired member of the 82nd airborne, opened his Facebook page in his California home that day and saw his sergeant’s call-out. The two men, now thousands of miles apart, had become closer than brothers in Iraq, serving shoulder-to-shoulder under mortar and rocket fire. Few words were needed. | Robert Bennett, a retired member of the 82nd airborne, opened his Facebook page in his California home that day and saw his sergeant’s call-out. The two men, now thousands of miles apart, had become closer than brothers in Iraq, serving shoulder-to-shoulder under mortar and rocket fire. Few words were needed. |
| “All okay, Top!” Mr. Bennett wrote. | “All okay, Top!” Mr. Bennett wrote. |
| In interviews, many veterans said they turn primarily to social media sites for support, where former units are at their fingertips, and a lifeline is just a keystroke away. | In interviews, many veterans said they turn primarily to social media sites for support, where former units are at their fingertips, and a lifeline is just a keystroke away. |
| “We have certainly tasted the same dust,” Mr. Bennett said. | “We have certainly tasted the same dust,” Mr. Bennett said. |
| For decades now, American veterans have forged bonds on battlefields, sleeping in sand-blown tents, swallowing fear in concrete bunkers, or cramming into the bowels of tanks for a dozen hours. When deployments end, those ties are stretched as veterans fan out across the United States. For Mr. Bennett, 50, the online buddy checks are as important as the conventional therapy that he has used to adapt to civilian life. | |
| “It’s me letting everyone know that I am there for them, and everyone letting me know they are there for me,” he said. | “It’s me letting everyone know that I am there for them, and everyone letting me know they are there for me,” he said. |
| Not all online interventions end with success. Matthew I. Day, a former tank driver, helped form a Facebook group called Peter the PTSD Awareness Penguin to share infantry humor. But it soon turned serious, attracting veterans seeking support. In 2014, an infantryman posted there, saying he “was done with this.” | Not all online interventions end with success. Matthew I. Day, a former tank driver, helped form a Facebook group called Peter the PTSD Awareness Penguin to share infantry humor. But it soon turned serious, attracting veterans seeking support. In 2014, an infantryman posted there, saying he “was done with this.” |
| “We tried to convince him that there is absolutely nothing in the world that killing yourself can solve,” Mr. Day said. | “We tried to convince him that there is absolutely nothing in the world that killing yourself can solve,” Mr. Day said. |
| But the man went out into the streets of Palmdale, Calif., with his pistol. He committed what appeared to be “suicide by cop,” by pointing his gun at deputies, who opened fire, killing him, a sheriff’s statement said. | But the man went out into the streets of Palmdale, Calif., with his pistol. He committed what appeared to be “suicide by cop,” by pointing his gun at deputies, who opened fire, killing him, a sheriff’s statement said. |
| “I think that ultimately the responsibility for us as a community is to be an open ear,” Mr. Day said. | “I think that ultimately the responsibility for us as a community is to be an open ear,” Mr. Day said. |
| Facebook pages are often set up as tributes to fallen comrades, or to encourage activities that show solidarity and spread awareness about suicide’s warning signs. In the 22 Push-ups Challenge, veterans and military families post videos of themselves doing 22 push-ups, then tag others to keep the chain going. | Facebook pages are often set up as tributes to fallen comrades, or to encourage activities that show solidarity and spread awareness about suicide’s warning signs. In the 22 Push-ups Challenge, veterans and military families post videos of themselves doing 22 push-ups, then tag others to keep the chain going. |
| Randall Stevenson, whose son served in the Marines in Afghanistan’s Sangin district in 2010, made a video this month, soon after his son, who was 25 years old, hanged himself with a belt. | Randall Stevenson, whose son served in the Marines in Afghanistan’s Sangin district in 2010, made a video this month, soon after his son, who was 25 years old, hanged himself with a belt. |
| “Six days ago, my son committed suicide after serving in Afghanistan, suffering from survivors guilt, PTSD, depression,” Mr. Stevenson said in the video, his voice breaking. “Three days ago, we buried him. Please, I don’t want this to be you.” | |
| In the video, the father says that he had surgery on his shoulder, but would give the push-ups his all. After struggling through them, he ended the video with, “Save lives.” | |
| In a telephone interview, Mr. Stevenson said his son had talked to him about combat in Afghanistan. “I never felt so afraid in my life. I never felt so alive in my life. I want to go back,” he quoted his son as saying. “He missed his buddies.” | In a telephone interview, Mr. Stevenson said his son had talked to him about combat in Afghanistan. “I never felt so afraid in my life. I never felt so alive in my life. I want to go back,” he quoted his son as saying. “He missed his buddies.” |
| There are official and professional lifelines, of course. The Department of Veterans Affairs crisis line has handled more than two million calls since it was started in 2007, and has dispatched emergency services more than 56,000 times. It also has online chat and text services. But some veterans say they steer away from the Veterans Affairs system. They are not sure a doctor who has never seen enemy fire can relate to their experiences. Some also distrust the system because of recent scandals and delays getting appointments. | |
| And so they take matters into their own hands. Members of the Second Battalion, Seventh Marine Regiment, maintain a Google document of contact information for emergencies. | And so they take matters into their own hands. Members of the Second Battalion, Seventh Marine Regiment, maintain a Google document of contact information for emergencies. |
| Zachary Ziegel, a former Marine who served in Iraq and Afghanistan, started a Buddy Check 22 Facebook group after he saw an Illinois television station’s Buddy Check 25 campaign promoting reminders for women to check themselves for breast cancer. Within months, his group had five million participants, he said. | Zachary Ziegel, a former Marine who served in Iraq and Afghanistan, started a Buddy Check 22 Facebook group after he saw an Illinois television station’s Buddy Check 25 campaign promoting reminders for women to check themselves for breast cancer. Within months, his group had five million participants, he said. |
| “Every time I don the uniform and drive in to my unit, everything begins to fall apart,” a man wrote on the group’s page recently. “I had to call in and not show last month. I thought going Reserves would be more manageable, but it wasn’t. I’m wondering what a counselor would advise.” | “Every time I don the uniform and drive in to my unit, everything begins to fall apart,” a man wrote on the group’s page recently. “I had to call in and not show last month. I thought going Reserves would be more manageable, but it wasn’t. I’m wondering what a counselor would advise.” |
| A few hours later, a stranger replied. “I am so grateful for what you do for us. If you need to talk and your friends and family not close, contact me.” | A few hours later, a stranger replied. “I am so grateful for what you do for us. If you need to talk and your friends and family not close, contact me.” |
| Some social media sites curate interactive maps pinpointing emergency resources for veterans and people in unrelated units who are willing to talk. | Some social media sites curate interactive maps pinpointing emergency resources for veterans and people in unrelated units who are willing to talk. |
| David Woolery was in the Marine Corps in eastern Afghanistan in 2004 when a bomb exploded under a convoy he was in, injuring some of the men. He got through that with the help of his fellow Marines, but the return to the United States was more unsettling. | David Woolery was in the Marine Corps in eastern Afghanistan in 2004 when a bomb exploded under a convoy he was in, injuring some of the men. He got through that with the help of his fellow Marines, but the return to the United States was more unsettling. |
| “Out here is every man for himself,” Mr. Woolery said. “People back-stabbing. It’s all me, me, me.” | “Out here is every man for himself,” Mr. Woolery said. “People back-stabbing. It’s all me, me, me.” |
| In 2015, Mr. Woolery also started a Buddy Check 22 Facebook group for his unit, which was a “big lifeline” that later expanded to other veterans. They shared stories of combat, spoke the same language. Recently, a member dropped a screen shot of a veteran’s suicidal remarks into the group’s page and wrote, “Let’s find this guy.” | |
| “The man had said his goodbyes and was about to kill himself,” Mr. Woolery said. But word spread, and eventually people tracked him down and sent help. It was lifesaving through crowd-sharing. | “The man had said his goodbyes and was about to kill himself,” Mr. Woolery said. But word spread, and eventually people tracked him down and sent help. It was lifesaving through crowd-sharing. |